Yvette Nicole Brown took on the heroic role of becoming a caretaker more than a decade ago. The actress has been taking care of her father with Alzheimer’s for the past eleven years but recently made the difficult decision to move her dad into a board and care home.
About 12 years ago, the 53-year-old moved her dad from Ohio to California to live with her after noticing he was a little off during their calls. Shortly after, he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, a degenerative brain disease that is also a form of dementia and impacts memory, thinking, and behavior and can become detrimental. The disease also disproportionately affects Black people.
“There was that moment of like, wow, I’m going to have my dad living with me for the first time, and it’s when he’s not capable of fully even experiencing this the way that I will be experiencing it,” Brown told PEOPLE of having her father come live with her. She was also excited about the opportunity because she mostly spent time with her mom after her parents divorced, so she looked forward to quality time with her father.
“Dementia is weird in that at some point they sort of lose their sense of self and they no longer are the person that they used to be. So with my dad, there’s some days where he’s 100% there and there’s some days where he’s not.”
The Community actress continued, “But it was the easiest decision I made because in my mind, he taught me so much. How can I not step up and be there for him in his moment of need? My dad comes first,” Brown added. The devoted daughter also asked to be released from her contract for Community at the time because she couldn’t manage 16-hour days on set and properly care for him.
In terms of how her dad transitioned into a board and care facility, a few months back he had a bad fall and broke his hip. Consequently, he needed surgery and rehabilitation but can no longer walk.
“He’s now at a place where he can’t be with me in the house anymore because he no longer walks. So now it’s shifted to me stepping into less of a daily caregiver role and more of just his daughter — I have not been able to be just his daughter in 11 years,” she shared.
“Releasing him to the care of other people was a very difficult thing to do and a very heartbreaking guilt-ridden choice to make. But the goal was to get the best care for him and that’s no longer me.” Brown also said she visits the assisted living facility several times a week to be by his side.
Throughout the decade-plus of playing a caregiver role, Brown faced a myriad of challenges, especially as it relates to navigating the healthcare system.
“The red tape you have to jump through just to get basic care for your loved one is shocking,” she said. “I had to fight for his physical therapy. I had to fight for his wheelchair. I went through two or three appeals processes where he was going to be discharged from his nursing care facility before he was ready.
“I shouldn’t have to fight this hard,” Brown continued. “You can have the means to take care of them, but there are certain things they just still won’t give you. And I don’t understand why it’s this hard to make sure that people in need can have what they need and what they’ve been paying for.”
The challenges have ignited a new fire in Brown and she’s ready to advocate for other caregivers around the country through her podcast, Squeezed.
“If there’s any silver lining to everything I’ve been through with my dad, I am now equipped to fight for every other family caregiver in this country because I have walked the gauntlet and I don’t want anyone to have to go through what I went through,” she said.
