Today is National Sex Day. The sexy holiday lets you observe your sensual side and celebrate love, intimacy, and connection. Sex and sexual exploration may be more challenging to broach for some than others. However, your sexual inhibitions should be embraced, as it’s a natural form of expression and can be empowering if you let it. Our sex series, “Sex Talk,” explores the different forms of sexual freedom, acts, and techniques, to enhance your life by yourself or with your partner(s). So for this holiday, we’re here to encourage you to succumb to your sexual desires; whether masturbating solo, watching porn with your partner, or engaging in the act freely, you can do what you please without feeling guilty. See some creative ways to celebrate the holiday from two of our “Sex Talk” experts and licensed clinical psychologists, certified intimacy and relationship coaches, Dr. Jacqueline Sherman and Chanta Blue, to experience intensified pleasure today and every day.
Recreate Your Fav Sex Memory: There is sexual power in revisiting an erotic memory from the past and recreating the spicy parts that turned you on! To bring your memory to life, it helps to start with tapping inward by journaling. You can use a prompt like “Close your eyes and remember when you experienced mind-blowing sex. Where were you? Who was present? What were you wearing? How was your mood? What position(s) did you enjoy the most? Where did you feel the most pleasure?” To help your mind connect to your favorite sex memory. After you have written the details of your sex memory, choose one aspect of the memory that you would like to recreate in celebration of your sexual liberation.
Masturbate Using a Novel Technique: Since we are creatures of habit, we tend to indulge in self-pleasure that feels familiar. In celebration of National Sex Day, masturbating utilizing new techniques can be pleasurable and liberating. You can decide to engage in solo masturbation or partnered masturbation (when partners self-pleasure in the presence of each other). Several underutilized masturbation methods include water masturbation, mindful masturbation, and edging.
Get Nude: Visiting a nude beach, spa, or resort can perfectly celebrate National Sex Day! In Western culture, the sexual liberation of Black women has been majorly impacted by unachievable, Eurocentric beauty standards, which has led many Black women to feel insecure about their bodies while struggling to dismantle their perfectionism to build sexual confidence. It is an act of self-love and sexual freedom to embrace your nudity in an audacious way. Also, documenting your thoughts and feelings by journaling about your ‘nude experience’ before, during, and after can provide great self-reflection.
Create a Sexual Menu: We have been extremely limited by the sexual images presented to us in the media and porn. As a result, we often default to sexual techniques and activities that look and feel familiar (even if we don’t think that pleasurable). In honor of National Sex Day, we can expand our sexual options by creating a sexual menu. On a piece of paper, make three columns titled “open,” “maybe,” and “closed.” In the open column, list sex activities you enjoy or think you would want. In the “maybe” column, list activities you may try under certain circumstances. For example, a memorable holiday. List activities you don’t enjoy or want to experience in the closed column. Feel free to share your sex menu with a current or future partner.
Redefine Your Definition of Sex: Many women are socialized to have a limited view of sex. For example, penis and vagina sex has unfortunately been taught as the patriarchal gold standard (on both a conscious and subconscious level). As an act of sexual liberation, redefining what sex means for you can shift your sexual understanding. As an evolving human, your definition will likely change throughout your lifetime. Using a prompt such as…. Defining what sex means to you during this season of your life can help you tap into your current sexual desires on National Sex Day.
Explore museum exhibits about love and sex. My favorites are the Museum of Sex in NYC and The Museum of Love in LA. They provide both educational value and fun interactive exhibits.
Attend a kink or sex party/event. This can range from a low-pressure social gathering to meet other folks interested in exploring their sexuality to an on-premise party where you can watch others or be watched engaging in various sexual behaviors.
Take a sex class. Sexuality educators host in-person and virtual courses on safely and correctly performing multiple sexual acts. This includes courses on dick riding, oral sex, erotic massage, fetish training, and more!