“Hey babe, if I went to Carnival in the Caribbean and danced on another man, would you be upset? It’s what people do at Carnival,” I asked my husband.
“Hell yeah!” he said in response. Nothing more nothing less.
That was the length of the conversation I had with my husband this morning after catching wind of all the fuss being made over Chance the Rapper‘s birthday trip to Jamaica for Carnival. I won’t bog you down with details in words, but just leave you simply with the videos that have people debating if the married MC was doing too much or simply having harmless fun.
There have been a variety of responses to these clips, from some saying people need to let him have his fun because this is what Carnival is all about, to others saying that if it were his wife, Kirsten, engaging in such antics, it would be an issue. You can check out those varying opinions below.
I’m operating under the assumption that if his wife, Kirsten, knew he was going to Jamaica for Carnival for his birthday of all celebratory events, then she was likely aware that there was a possibility he would dance with other women, and do so in this manner. And dancing is not sex, it’s not exchanging numbers, it’s not sharing a kiss. It’s sharing space and enjoying music together.
Is it completely harmless though? I think in situations like this, where his dance moves were captured on video and involved some unnecessary touching (the booty slap was a bit much Mr. Bennett, and the face of the woman dancing on him seems to say that), he might want to reel it in a little bit. People in relationships should know that for the sake of your partner, the last thing you want is something that puts unnecessary attention on them because you wanted to let loose and have fun. And as a public figure, he knew that cameras would be on him. I’ve already seen some distasteful, disappointing tweets about Kirsten’s looks in response to these clips, as though people’s useless opinions about her beauty offer a good reason for him to dance on other women in whatever way he likes.
And it’s also important to know what you yourself would be ok with. Just as my husband wouldn’t be too keen on me backing it up at anybody’s Carnival on another man, I wouldn’t want to see video of him being danced on by another woman, in a revealing costume or fully covered for that matter. Go have fun, eat good and dance, but keep it cute, sir.
And while many men are calling Chance’s dancing nothing but innocent fun, one has to wonder if they’d say the same about their girlfriends and wives or if they’d be giving them a hard time for dancing freely on another fella. Know yourself and your partner for that matter.
And for the record, I don’t think the questions about his conduct in these clips is about trying to disrespect anyone’s “culture.” We get that this kind of fun is the norm for Carnival celebrations in the Caribbean. It’s also common dancing in Chicago, where Chance is from (juking was a favorite pastime of mine growing up in the South Suburbs). This type of dancing on its own isn’t inappropriate, as some pegged it in “mainstream” publications. But what I think the conversations are really about is, as a married man who has gone out his way to celebrate the institution of marriage in his music (see the inspiration for his The Big Day album), it is interesting to allow yourself to be documented letting women who aren’t your wife back it up on you. Now, does anyone think he actually took things any further with women at the event? No. Still, it does create an interesting debate about what people should and shouldn’t expect from their partners in situations like these.
Hopefully the clip won’t cause any issues for the star, husband and father of two. In reality, he does look like he was just having fun with his friends and being hyped up by them in those moments, which lasted a few seconds. If Kirsten was cool with it, then the rest of us should be, too. But if she’s not, well…then it’s a testament to the importance of keeping some of your fun off of Beyonce’s Internet — lest you become a trending topic for reasons you don’t want nor need.