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Home · News

'I Do' How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets

'Tis the season to tie the knot. Check out some planning tips from experts and newlyweds, and rules to be a fab guest if you aren't the bride.

By Charreah K. Jackson · Updated October 27, 2020
01
Review Your Guest List

It’s the biggest influencer of your budget. “As women of color, we have a strong sense of family and feel connected to many people, so our weddings tend to be large,” shares celebrity event planner and interior designer Diann Valentine. “Do not sacrifice quality for quantity or feel pressured to invite everyone you know. People can be happy for you and not be at your wedding.” Make those who can’t attend feel included by mailing marriage announcements or hosting a wedding video viewing party.

‘I Do’ How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets
Magical Moment Photography
02
Include the Kids

If either of you has children, be sure to acknowledge them in the festivities. When blackandmarriedwithkids.com founders Lamar and Ronnie Tyler wed, Lamar presented his new daughter with diamond earrings and gave his new son a gold chain at the ceremony.

‘I Do’ How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets
Getty Images
03
Prioritize Your Vows

“They are the words that will govern your marriage and should not be taken lightly,” says C.K. Alexander, a New York City wedding officiant and vow coach through her company, Love Ink. Set a date to write your pledge, which should take less than two minutes to recite. Also consider having your guests read vows at the service to be a support system for your union.

‘I Do’ How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets
Getty Images
04
Personalize Your Event

Put your unique stamp on the celebrations. “When people walk in, it should feel like you and your partner,” says Atlanta wedding planner and EllyB events creator Eliana Baucicault. Let your mother give you away, or have your dog be the ring bearer. Instead of a traditional father-daughter dance, blackbridalbliss.com founder Bridgette Bartlett-Royall compiled a playlist of her late dad’s favorite songs and shared cherished memories of him at her reception.

‘I Do’ How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets
Getty Images
05
Involve Your Groom

The wedding is often considered to be all about the bride. However, men are increasingly participating, with 83 percent of grooms helping with planning, according to a David’s Bridal survey. The honeymoon or the playlist is a great area to let your guy have extra input.

‘I Do’ How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets
Getty Images
06
Talk Business With the Bridal Party

Many of us have experienced the pleasure and pain of being a bridesmaid. Avoid tension with your girl-friends by detailing up front your expectations and the attendant costs for everything from dresses, shoes and hairdos to your Vegas bachelorette party.

‘I Do’ How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets
Getty Images
07
Be A Hospitable Host

It’s your special day, but you’re also responsible for your guests having a fabulous time. “Always try to give a plus one because no one wants to go to a wedding alone,” Valentine says. Add interactive activities to get people moving and mingling. Craft tables, candy bars and even massage areas are popular guest stations.

‘I Do’ How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets
Getty Images
08
Take It All In

“It will be the fastest day of your life thus far,” Bartlett-Royall says. “You’ve spent months planning and it’s over in a few hours.” Be sure to savor the memorable moment of having all the people you love together in one room, taste the food you selected and spend time with your new spouse.

‘I Do’ How To: Wedding Experts and Newlyweds Share Planning Secrets
Getty Images

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