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Home · Love & Sex

What's Your Type: The Relationship Guide

Whats Your Type
By · Updated October 29, 2020
01
Finesse Helps You Find Your Match

Whether you love button-downed brothers with briefcases or bad boys with oversize diamond earrings, ESSENCE columnist Finesse Mitchell explains how to find your Mr. Right. Read on to find out whether your ideal mate is waiting for you at an outdoor jazz festival or in a Las Vegas nightclub.

*Statements throughout this gallery do not necessarily reflect the behavior or opinions of the individuals pictured.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
AP Image
02
The Baller

Jamie Foxx

You’ll Find Him
In hot Las Vegas nightclubs at 2:00 A.M. or gyms so swanky they employ their own DJs.

The Perfect First Date
A few rounds of miniature golf. They love mixing romance with a little physical competition.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Getty Image
03
The Baller

Ludacris

A Good Pickup Line
“Football? That’s such a rough game!” What he hears: “You’re so brave and strong!”

How to Reel Him In
It’s the cool cutie who plays the good-friend role and brings order to his life without stressing him that usually wins his heart.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Getty Image
04
The Suit

Hill Harper

You’ll Find Him
On the golf course or in Barnes & Noble trying to get his book autographed by Cornel West.

The Perfect First Date
The theater or heading off to wine country to find the perfect cabernet. He’s high-class and highbrow.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Getty Image
05
The Suit

Tavis Smiley

A Good Pickup Line
“Can you believe what the Asian stock market did today?”

How to Reel Him In
Black women typically think he “acts White.” Make him feel comfortable in his own skin: Don’t laugh when he does the Carlton dance.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Getty Image
06
Mr. Cool

Common

You’ll Find Him
Reading at the bookstore, performing at a spoken-word café, or marching at a rally.

A Good Pickup Line
“I hope Obama really makes a difference and doesn’t turn into just another politician.”

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Jennifer Cooper
07
Mr. Cool

Laz Alonso

The Perfect First Date
Long walks in the park. Being nonmaterialistic means your boy is cheap.

How to Reel Him In
Assure him you also believe the truth is out there, and don’t ridicule any of his conspiracy theories—no matter how wild they seem.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Getty Image
08
True Believer

Tyler Perry

A Good Pickup Line
“So what did you get out of the Word today, Brother?”

How to Reel Him In
Don’t jump into bed too soon. Religious brothers are known to “try you,” but then make you think you’re Jezebel’s sister if you respond.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Getty Image
09
True Believer

Talib Kweli

You’ll Find Him
At church, an Earth, Wind & Fire concert or any outdoor jazz festival.

The Perfect First Date
At brunch or dinner and a movie. He loves the Lord and is laid-back.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Getty Image
10
Lovable Thug

50 Cent

You’ll Find Him
At the neighborhood hoop spot, on the corner, in the pool hall or in jail. Seriously.

The Perfect First Date

A “house date” at your place. It’s free, and he won’t get caught by one of his other women.

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
WENN
11
Lovable Thug

Allen Iverson

A Good Pickup Line
“I still can’t believe HBO canceled ‘The Wire.’”

How to Reel Him In
Good girls want thugs and vice versa. Be the straight-laced sweetie who won’t judge his bad habits (but will show him a better side to life).

Be sure to pick up the February 2009 issue of ESSENCE for more tips from Finesse on finding your type.

Check out these Hollywood hunks »

What’s Your Type: The Relationship Guide
Getty Image
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