The end of summer is fast approaching, ladies. Are you already starting to worry whether your fiery summer romance with bae will last past Labor Day? We get it. Without the backdrop of sandy beaches and starry skies, it can be hard for some couples to keep the fire burning when temperatures start to cool down. For those of you wondering how to keep your summer flame alive through fall, we sought out the help of relationship therapist Eboni Harris. Here, she breaks down five common signs that your summer relationship is likely to heat up even more in fall.
1. You’re planning events for the future.
Harris says that a common red flag of summer flings is that they typically come with an expiration date.
“When people see someone as short-term, they deliberately keep all plans within a 48 to 72-hour window, in case something better comes along,” Harris tells ESSENCE. “If your boo is making plans to spend Labor Day with you (and time thereafter), it’s safe to say they see you in their future. Bonus points if you’ve bought [future] concert tickets or invested in any type of prepaid date.”
2. You’ve met bae’s family and friends.
Being introduced to your significant other’s loved ones is a sign that things are serious.
Harris says if your partner regularly brings you around their friends and family, then there’s a chance they see you in their immediate future.
“It could also be a sign their loved ones enjoy your company,” suggests Harris. “When you see someone as a long-term option, you want to make sure everyone in your life gets used to them being around.”
3. There’s a healthy amount of communication about your relationship.
If your S.O. is willing to discuss both the good and bad aspects of your relationship, all signs point to your partner being in it for the long haul.
“Being able to talk it out when things are going right and when things are going wrong shows your partner wants this relationship to work,” says Harris.
According to Harris, it’s easier to ignore real issues as long as you’re not concerned with how long your partner will be around.”
4. You survived your first argument.
Having a healthy argument is completely normal in relationships, as long as you both are willing to compromise.
“The first argument says a lot about where you are,” explains Harris. “If you’ve argued and made up, this shows your partner isn’t the type to run at the first sign of discomfort. This means they understand arguing is a part of relationships, and they’re willing to work through it in order to stay around.”
5. Sex hasn’t tainted the relationship.
The fact that your relationship has remained consistent and you two have only gotten closer after being intimate is a strong indicator your relationship will last beyond summer.
“One concern many have when dating someone new is their intention,” says Harris. “It can be hard to know if someone is investing their time because they genuinely want to get to know you or just to get in your pants. If you’ve done ‘the do’ already, and the relationship hasn’t shifted, then you’ll probably make it past Labor Day.”
Harris recommends paying attention to how you communicate, as well as the effort bae is putting in and how much time you’re spending together. These are all signs your summer romance could blossom into a real relationship.