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Home · Relationships

11 Ways To Keep Folks Out Of Your Love Life For Good (Bye Aunt Debbie!)

Say no to nosy friends and family and yes to happiness with these foolproof tips.

By Ashley Coleman · March 10, 2016October 27, 2020
01
When Friends and Family Attack

Relationships can be hard enough without the input of friends and family. It’s all about boundaries. No matter how close you are to a friend or family member, the inner most details of your relationship should be off limits. Here’s a few ways to protect what’s yours.

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02
Leave Intimacy In the Bedroom

As women, we love to gab. (Especially about our men) But it’s really important to keep your most intimate moments with your partner, private. Do not tell friends about something that could possibly embarrass your partner or peak a friend’s interest. 

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03
Don’t Act Off Emotion

You’re in a heated disagreement and you’re two seconds away from calling your brother or dad, but it’s just not smart. Unless you are in clear and present danger, reacting out of emotion and bringing other people into your disagreement is not going to end well. When you make up, you will look for everyone else to go back to normal and it doesn’t work that way.

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04
Take it To God

I know, it may sound corny, but the truth of the matter is, God won’t judge you. In a time where you may be uncertain in your relationship, pray about it. You definitely don’t have to worry about God telling anyone else your business.

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05
Avoid Public Spats

Fighting in front of others is like an open invitation into your relationship or marriage. If it’s possible to avoid fighting in front of others, do so at all costs.

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06
Work On How You Communicate

It’s easy at times to talk to friends or family about relationship issues because there is no pressure. But it can create distance when you don’t bring your gripes to your partner, first. Find the best way to communicate concerns to your partner, which may involve waiting for the right time.

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07
Choose Your Complaints Wisely

No one knows your partner better than you. You know the ins and outs, the good and the bad. If all you ever do is complain to someone who doesn’t know them as well, you will negatively impact their view of your partner. Be very aware of whether you are portraying your partner in a negative light.

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08
Seek Healthy Advice When You Need It

It may be too idealistic to think that you will never need another person’s advice or insight when it comes to relationships. In the event that you do, consider the source. It’s all about seeking wisdom because your relationship is valuable and should be protected.

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09
Get On The Same Page

It’s important to know what your partner is comfortable with you sharing and what they may not be comfortable with. Many times, men are a lot more sensitive about what you share about them to your closest friends and family. Make sure that you have the conversation and respect the agreement.

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10
Nip Some Things In The Bud

Sometimes friends and family can pry. They ask questions and it’s up to you to set the boundaries by being bold enough to say, “That’s private and something we don’t discuss.” 

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11
Do Not Vent On Social Media

Stay positive by keeping negative people and comments at bay. “Honestly, I block people [on Twitter] all the time,” Sidibe explained. “I prefer my world to smell like strawberries and look like rainbows, and at least on Twitter I can block negative comments, fighting, and opinions about what I should be doing in my life. I am compulsive about keeping those dark clouds out of my life. Choose your tweets wisely.”

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12
Trust Your Own Instincts When It Comes to Love

Many times we run to outside sources because we don’t trust our own feelings and emotions. We say “So am I right in this situation?” to a friend. Many times we are asking biased sources but if we took a moment alone to ourselves, we would find our answers and be able to resolve conflict more effectively.

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