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Home · Relationships

7 Signs His Love Is Not Real

Not every guy who says he loves you is being honest. Here are seven signs that his love is not real.

By Kevin Carr · November 26, 2012October 28, 2020
01
Is He for Real?

Since releasing my first book, my inbox never seems to sleep. I don’t mind at all. I love to communicate with readers and hear their feedback. Many women who contact me have moving stories and ask the same question: “Is he sincere?” Sadly, too many find out the man they’re dating isn’t long after they’ve become attached. I can help. Here are seven indicators to look out for.

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02
Is He Playing Word Games?

His intentions and feelings about you should be clear. You shouldn’t be forced to guess how he feels about you or play silly word games when you ask. When it comes to dating, assumptions are never good. They can be misleading and will cause you to get hurt, leaving you to pick up the pieces of your heart later.

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03
Is He Consistent?

“I love you.” “I need you.” “I want you.” It all sounds good, but it only rings true if his words are married to his actions. Sincerity is proven by consistent action over a course of time, so pay attention to the signs. If he’s one week on and two weeks off, he isn’t as sincere as he would like you to believe. However, if you find a man consistent in his pursuit of you, you may have a keeper on your hands.

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04
Does He Value Your Time (Together)?

We live in a world that moves at a frantic pace. That being said, the old saying still applies: People make time for what they want. Take that to heart and know that if he’s serious about you he will be just as serious about spending time with you – even when it’s not most convenient for him.

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05
Is He Chasing Or Running?

If he is chasing, then he will be busy pursuing you. What does the pursuit look like? Here’s your guide: He should be calling and texting, planning dates and outings and getting on your calendar. You should not be doing all the work. If you are, you like him more than he likes you. The earlier you recognize his lack of interest, the better. Accept what is there instead of looking for what isn’t.

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06
Are You His Best Kept Secret?

You shouldn’t be. If you have been dating for a substantial amount of time and he isn’t open to meeting or hanging out with your friends and family and you haven’t met his, than you have a problem. His best friends don’t count. (Sometimes even side chicks meet them.) After a while, things should be out in the open and people should know that you exist. If not, find a man who wants to show you off, not hide you.

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07
How Long is His Attention Span?

If you guys aren’t dating exclusively you may not have all of his attention. That’s to be expected. But does he pay attention to you? His sincere interest in you should aid him in noticing the little things. Things like the kind of places you like to eat, the shoes you wore last night or what make you smile. Your interests are only visible to people who are looking beneath the surface. His thoughtfulness will serve as a sign of his sincere interest in you.

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08
Is He Chomping At the Bit?

Trivial pursuits are rarely lengthy. It’s important to pace yourself and the relationship. He should allow time to for love to run its course and then — and only then — will you find out all you need to know about him. Know that sincerity will give him the patience needed to truly love you as you should be loved. If you want it to last, please don’t let him rush it.

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09
Tell Kevin Your Thoughts

Let’s talk some more. Be sure to leave questions or comments for me below. Keep up with me over on IfMenAreDogs.com or find me on Twitter anytime. For more advice from me, read 10 Things You Think Impress Him, But Don’t.

Kiss and Tell: ESSENCE Sets Up Four Single Ladies On Blind Dates (Watch What Happens!)

Courtesy of Kevin Carr

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