Whether it was by circumstance, heartbreak, or by choice, we’ve all experienced what its like to fly solo. But in the midst of being single and figuring out what you want, you can absolutely live your best life!
Though it’s not wrong to yearn for companionship when you’re living that single life, being alone provides an opportunity to heal, spend time focusing on your own happiness, or simply shaping up a list of what you want or don’t want in a future partner.
If we needed any more proof, celebrity women like Tracee Ellis Ross, Lizzo, and Yvonne Orji are showing us how empowering being a bachelorette can be. They’ve even dropped some gems about why they’re finding an abundance of joy during in their singlehood.
Scroll through the gallery to see read 10 inspiring quotes from single celebrity ladies who are living their best life.
Tracee Ellis Ross
In a vulnerable Instagram post
shared on Valentine's Day 2020, the Black-ish
actress is reminded all the single ladies that even if they're not currently boo'd up, their lives can still be full of love. "As a happily and gloriously long time single woman who also has a deep desire to be in romantic partnership with someone, Valentine’s Day can feel tricky," she wrote. "But, I am reminded that although I don’t have one special partner... my life is wonderfully full of so much special love."
Mary J. Blige
Mary J. Blige is doing "just fine" after divorcing ex-manager and husband of fifteen years Kendu Isaacs. In 2019, the singer told the NY Post
that she's "not dating by choice" and that she's "trying to just continue to build and structure so that when I do turn 50, things can be different." ESSENCE also caught up with the singer this week regarding the launch of her new Sun Goddess Wine launch, where the singer said she's been spending quarantine working on herself. "I just got quiet and I just really started digging into me," she said. "Every single day, it's learning how to be a better person. I'm focusing on me and trying to stay in a higher vibration."
NEWARK, NJ - AUGUST 26: Singer-songwriter and Star Power Award recipient Mary J. Blige attends 2018 Black Girls Rock! at New Jersey Performing Arts Center on August 26, 2018 in Newark, New Jersey. (Photo by Gilbert Carrasquillo/WireImage)
During a moving speech at the 2020 Essence Black Women In Hollywood Awards luncheon, the actress bravely spoke up
about finding herself on the heels of a divorce. "You will always be the thing—whether you’ve got a man or not, whether you have someone chasing you. It doesn’t matter," she told the audience. "You’re the thing. You get up every day and choose yourself, and you teach your children to do the same.”
Following her breakup with ESPN analyst Emmanuel Acho, Orji shared that she was happily single, and that she had faith in God that a better situation was in store. “I just have to say, the reason why I am so good and so happy is because I know how God works,” she said
on her Jesus & Jollof
podcast. “I have seen God’s MO so many times, that like in the way that you can be like, ‘Aw man, but I thought this was it! I thought this was the one!’ God be like, ‘Oh that’s what you thought? I got the goods for you.’”
The singer, who once professed to knowing how to love herself in the song "Soulmate," said there's a very specific reason she doesn't feel pressured to rush into a relationship. “I’m a very, very single bitch,” said the 32-year-old performer to People
. “But even if I were in a relationship, I’m a single-minded individual, and I really like my freedom. I think there’s a lot of people that need to be in relationships and need to be in love. I want it sometimes, but I don’t need it."
SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA - JANUARY 06: Lizzo performs at Sydney Opera House on January 06, 2020 in Sydney, Australia. (Photo by Don Arnold/Getty Images)
actress told appeared on a 2017 episode of ESSENCE's Yes, Girl
podcast and dropped a gem about keeping your dating life private until the time is right. "I just feel like relationships are sacred until you’re in a space where you are really certain and knowing,” said Hall
. “Until you see and know what that part of your life is, inviting the public in [is off limits]."
LOS ANGELES, CA - AUGUST 22: Actress Regina Hall arrives at the premiere of Magnolia Pictures' "Support The Girls" at the Arclight Theatre on August 22, 2018 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
In a reflective Instagram post
from 2018, Hilson said giving yourself a break for self-reflection while single is key. “I believe in reflecting, growing, and healing in between relationships," Hilson wrote. "I don’t Tarzan swing from vine to vine out of fear, loneliness, ego, or validation cuz I truly enjoy my life by myself, too. I’m not waiting or looking. The right one will find me when it’s time. I’m just focused on being the best human I can be."
During a January 2020 segment on The Real
, Seales made a compelling point about why marriage is not necessarily a goal for her. "I think once upon a time, marriage was set as the goal because for a lot of women, just socially, that was our best way at getting access to finance, to safety, to security, but we’re in a different era," she said. "There’s just more options [now.] It’s not to say one is better than the other.”
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - JUNE 23: Amanda Seales poses for a portrait during the BET Awards 2019 at Microsoft Theater on June 23, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Bennett Raglin/Getty Images for BET)
In an article with The New York Times
, Goldberg revealed how she came to understand that its ok to not want a life partner. "People expect you to have a boyfriend. They expect you to get married," she said. "So I kept trying to do that, but I didn’t want to share information with somebody else. I didn’t want anybody asking me why I was doing what I was doing, or to have to make the other person feel better. If you’re in a relationship, you have to do those things, and it took me a while to figure out that I didn’t want to." She concluded, "I’d be thinking, 'why don’t I feel the thing that I’m supposed to?' Then one day I thought: 'I don’t have to do this. I don’t have to conform.'"
Berry, who divorced actor Olivier Martinez in 2016, said in an Instagram live chat with Lena Waithe that being single has been so enjoyable, she just might stay that way for a while. "I’m very much a relationship-oriented person, I always want to be with someone," Berry confessed, according to People
. "But I decided, no I’m going to slow my roll, I’m going to take a minute and I’m going to spent time with me."