You’ve seen celebrity clinical psychologist Dr. Sherry Blake, author of The Single Married Woman: True Stories of Why Women Feel All Alone in Their Marriages, keep the Braxton sisters calm on the hit show Braxton Family Values. Now it’s your turn to sit in her chair…
Dr. Sherry,
I must start by saying I love reading your column. Now, here’s my dilemma: I’ve been seeing this guy for six months now and I’ve found out a few things that have brought about concern. First, he lied about his age, and then he lied about the number of children he has too. I also found out that he is financially unstable and living with his mother. I decided to take some time away from him while he works on getting himself together. He is a real sweetheart to me and I’m not sure if my time away from him should be permanent or not.
Sincerely,
Torn
Dear Sis,
You decided to take “some” time away from this guy? Really!? Maybe you should consider spending a lifetime away from him. In only six months of knowing him, he has lied about his age and the number of children he has. These are only the two lies you currently know about. It is apparent that he did not volunteer the fact that he is financially unstable and lives with his mother too. Given all of this, are you really questioning if the time away from him should be permanent or not?
Your relationship is built on a lie, sis. Is there anything he has been honest and straightforward about? Being a “sweetheart” is the easiest thing to do and may be the only thing that he has to offer you at this time. He may or may not be able to get himself together. Although that is important, that should not be your issue. Your issue is the fact that he has repeatedly lied to you and shattered any element of trust from the start. You have to ask yourself if you really want to be in a relationship with a liar. It really does not matter why he lied or why he did not openly share information. The fact is, he has not been honest with you. If you are looking for a project or someone that you have to take care of, he is your guy. If not, it is time to move on and never look back. You deserve more but you must demand more from a relationship. If someone shows you who they are, believe them! – Dr. Sherry
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