You’ve seen celebrity clinical psychologist Dr. Sherry Blake, author of The Single Married Woman: True Stories of Why Women Feel All Alone in Their Marriages, keep the Braxton sisters calm on the hit show Braxton Family Values. Now it’s your turn to sit in her chair…
Hi, Dr. Sherry. My name is Mandy and I just broke up with my boyfriend about a week ago. The thing is, he keeps calling and texting me. And when I do answer his calls and texts, he starts flirting with me and then tells me that we’re just friends. We still have sex. Am I just a booty call to him or does he still have feelings for me and just doesn’t want to admit them? I am beyond confused here and I need help. What does he want from me? — Anonymous
Mandy, do not fool yourself. You are no more than just a booty call—and an easy one at that. Sis, anytime a guy can call or text and flirt a little bit to drop by and have sex, he will. He is not looking for a serious relationship. When he reminds you that you are just friends, he is reminding you that he doesn’t want a relationship with you.
There is no evidence to suggest that he has any real feelings for you. As long as you provide sex when he calls, he does not have to view you as anything more than a drop-in booty call. Forget his motives. What are yours? Why do you want a relationship with this man?
I am sure there was a reason you broke up with him in the beginning. Take a serious look at why you are allowing him to have this role in you life. Is it just the sex? If so, take the sex away, and then ask yourself: “What is left?” I am hearing you say you want more than sex. If that is the case, your choices must reflect that now. Otherwise, you will always be nothing more than a booty call to him and you deserve better. What you have going on with him does not even rise to the level seems to be even less than friends with benefits. If you want more, you must not settle – ever! – Dr. Sherry
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