Stephany and Cadence are taking New York City.
Your favorite Internet mother-and-daughter duo has left behind their longtime digs in North Carolina to start over in the Big Apple, and no one is more excited than the beloved 6-year-old.
“The Brooklyn girl has returned,” Stephany Faublas says of her tiny companion. “Not me! She will remind you quickly. I’m not the Brooklyn girl; she is. She was born here.”
Faublas, a popular content producer and educator known for her transparent and relatable parenting content with her daughter, previously lived and worked as a teacher in Brooklyn. It was in this city that she birthed Cadence with her ex, a relationship that turned abusive, and she would have to find her way out of while caring for an infant. She’s returned, along with her littlest lady, to take advantage of the great opportunities that have blossomed from her presence online, following previous visits almost weekly for work.
“I feel wonderful about it just because this time it’s on very different circumstances,” she says. Cadence also has been having a ball. “She loves it. The minute she touched down, she was ready to be out, explore. She loves the subway. She’s been really, really excited.”
“We’re besties,” she declares. “I hope she chooses this when we’re older. I hope she chooses to hang out with me for as long as possible. That’s my goal.”
The two are getting lost around the city, aiming to become real New Yorkers. Along the way, they’ve encountered fans, which they’re always astounded by. “We’re both still getting used to it, just because we regard ourselves as very normal. The other day, someone was like, ‘Stephany?! I know that bob anywhere!’ she recalls. “They’re recognizing certain characteristics about us without even knowing that it’s us first. That’s going to take a while to get used to.”
When asked if she ever worries about the fan base that Cadence has accrued, knowing that the Internet can be a crazy place, Faublas clarifies that her platform’s focus is truly on her experiences. Her daughter only recently became a part of it.
“I lead in sharing my story, she just so happenstance, comes into play,” she shares. I had my platform for a while before I decided to have Cadence included. I don’t even think I made a conscious decision. She remained, but she’s not the focal point of what I’m sharing. I’m sharing my journey as a mom, my journey becoming a single mother, and what reshaping life looks like for me. So I’m not worried about overstepping her boundaries. But what I do pay attention to is, I won’t share certain spaces of hers. Her room, small details of her day to day. But otherwise, I’m good with that. This is my story. She’s just in it [laughs].”
To further drive that point home, Faublas has an established podcast, Afterbirth, focused on the intersection of motherhood with ever-shifting womanhood. On that platform, she’s been transparent about raising a child while simultaneously “raising” herself.
“Her health, her wellness, comes after mine,” she says. “I had to prioritize my health, my wellbeing, my wants and needs, and realize that’s not selfish. My health determines and dictates her health, whether that be physical or emotional. So I’m raising myself while also raising her. There’s a lot of unlearning and relearning.
“These are the things I want to be extremely honest about in sharing my story,” she adds. “It looks cute, but it’s the furthest thing from cute when you shut the camera off. It is the furthest thing from cute to raise a child and to raise them properly.”
She uses her podcast to dive deeper, having found that many of her social media followers, who are often mothers, wanted to know her story. “Motherhood needs to be felt. It’s not about reading a book. There are parenting books, and you can get all the information and facts you want. But when you’re in the field, it’s a completely different type of work. It can only be felt,” she states emphatically. “I can only relate to other moms if I know how you’re really feeling. Tell me the truth about what is going on. I don’t want to hear or see rainbows and butterflies all the time because I’m not feeling that at home…I really wanted to create that space where we talk about the things that make up motherhood that are more complex than what we’re given time to talk about in society.”
So, how does she navigate single motherhood with such poise? Faublas is quick to tell you it’s because “she has to,” while also being clear about what she can manage all on her own.
“I do what I can,” she admits. “Thankfully, I have a child who’s a bit more emotionally tapped in and understands it is just me and you. She does step up and step in a lot in doing things for herself, and sometimes I feel guilty about that because she might seem a bit too aware. I want her to be a child for as long as she can be.”
But things are changing. With the success of her content curation, leading to deals and appearance opportunities, Faublas can now afford support.
“I was finally blessed, blessed, blessed to hire help. I do have a nanny. With that type of help now, it takes a lot off my shoulders in making sure the day is planned. Finding help has been monumental for the motherhood journey,” she says. She’s looking to be a help to other women on their motherhood journey. In addition to her podcast, she also recently launched what’s called the FU Fund, the name inspired by the idea of “F-U money” or funds a woman collects quietly to help her start over. She kickstarted the nonprofit organization, providing women with financial support they can apply for, with her financial advisor Danaya Famous. The inspiration was her own experience.
“I was not brought up to have financial literacy, so I struggled with that. I’ve gone through several periods where it was check to check, making it work, really just doing what I had to do…so I told myself I was going to get a financial advisor because I really wanted to understand my money habits, my money psychology and how to make my money work for me,” she says. “I want to be able to provide women the ability to get out of whatever it is. To be able to get yourself some financial security to make your dreams come true, so you’re not tethered to the thing that’s holding you down. That’s what helped me. The second I was more financially secure, there were a lot of things people couldn’t say to me, a lot of ways men could no longer treat me, and there were a lot of prisons I was holding myself in, and I was able to open the door. So I definitely want to be able to provide that opportunity to as many young girls and women as possible.”
When it comes to helping herself on this journey, that is, pouring into herself, Faublas admits she’s a work in progress. Sometimes you’re in seasons as a parent where the needs of your child feel like your only focus. But she acknowledges that hiring help is a step in the right direction to practice self-care. It’s opened the door for her to discover things that she’d like to change about herself, and she hasn’t had the room to see it until now. That’s a win.
“Getting the nanny is a big deal. I’m going to give myself permission to sit in that,” Faublas says, celebrating the freedom she has recouped through that investment. “So, pouring into myself is going to actually not be spa days and walks. It’s going to be getting my life together, for real.”
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