As women we often think we have to be all things to all people, all at the same time. As a wife, mother, actress and businesswoman, I definitely feel the pressure to perform well in all areas. Women with kids, a husband and a career, have been accused of having it all and complaining about any of it is considered a sin to those who don’t. Well, I can say from experience that the devil in hell cannot stop you from being blessed but he can alter whether or not you enjoy the journey.
The soul of a woman is so important to maintain given all that is on our plates. Figuring out how to do it can be a little tricky. My prayer was, ‘Lord, please help me. How can I do it all and not be overwhelmed? How can I do it all and still be happy?’ His answer: Find the stolen moments of joy in all you do. Yessss honey! I got excited because now I had something I could put in action. First, I created a place in my house that was a special retreat. Before I moved into my new house I would go sit down in the closet. It was the only place I could have privacy to think, pray, clear my head. The space I have now is custom. It’s an outdoor seating area that instantly brings me to a serene state of mind.
I had to get a little more creative with my children. After being gone all day and coming home tired I knew they needed more than I had to give. After much thought I came up with the idea to have random pajama parties. Ok, I admit there is a great deal in this idea for ME... getting to put my pj's on as soon as I get home is a winner no matter what. Second, I get to relax with my children, which is a lost art. And lastly something funny always happens (if you saw my reality show Leave It To Niecy on TLC then you know what I mean). In addition to recapping our day we also find time to attend church together. The adage “a family that prays together, stays together” is so true.
I keep my soul in balance with my husband by making time to "download.” At the beginning of the day we have pillow talk before we get out of bed. At the end of the day we find a quiet place (sitting by the pool, taking a walk, or laying across the bed) and we share our day. Good, bad or funny we talk about it all. If you make your best friend and your significant other the same person you don’t have to disconnect to go tell you girlfriend everything. We also make sure we laugh everyday—no matter what.
I have also found a way to feed my soul at work. The set of The Soul Man is a great place to work. I work with Cedric the Entertainer so there is plenty of jokes and laughter to go around. The thing that keeps me tapped into my center on my job is the intention to "be of service to others.” Whether it’s an act of kindness, kind word, a hug, a favor for a co-worker…being available for God to use me does a lot for my soul.
With all of your responsibilities, how do you find time to maintain your soul? I’d like to here from you...
Actress Niecy Nash is also the author of It's Hard To Fight Naked. Catch her and Cedric the Entertainer on TV Land's Soul Man, Wednesdays at 11pm