Who makes the rules on dating after a breakup? I remember my great uncle telling my mother something that stuck with me through the years. She asked him “Why have you been married so many times?” His response? “You keep trying until you get it right.”
Granted, most of us don’t want a ton of failed marriages under our belt. The plan is to do it once. But, just because we’ve had one, two, or an undisclosed amount of failed relationships, doesn’t mean that we have to stop trying. With recent stories involving Ciara getting engaged to Seattle Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson and The Real talk show host Adrienne Bailon dating gospel artist, Israel Houghton, the critics have been unrelenting. As seasoned adults they have all had some public relationships that they may want to put behind them, but some fans are in arms because they’ve seemingly found love too soon after their breakups.
From Russell Wilson’s ex-wife speaking out about him to Ciara’s ex-fiancé, Future, blasting the couple about taking pics with the son they share together, it seems it’s tough to please everyone when you just want to move on. There is no rule book when it comes to relationships. Most of our opinions are based on our own personal feelings and experiences when we aren’t the ones actually in the relationship. Or we judge people based on how their previous relationship may have ended never really knowing both sides. Searching for love and companionship is a huge part of our lives, so who’s to say what’s too soon?
I remember coming out of a long-term relationship and the pressure that I felt about dating “too soon” after. But the reality was, though I still had some feelings and issues to work through, I wasn’t going to hide under a rock because something else didn’t work out. Sure, it was a life changing separation but whether we want to accept it or not, life goes on.
We do not have to be victims to our pasts and definitely not to our exes. If you aren’t with that person anymore, why should they or anyone else get to dictate how you get to move forward in your dating life? Sure, when children are involved, it can complicate things a bit. But ultimately, all of us deserve to be happy and to find someone who loves us, even if it takes us some time to “get it right.”
What do you think? Is there an unwritten rule on waiting to date after a breakup?