Every day we feature the beloved “Strawberry Letter” franchise that is so popular on “The Steve Harvey Morning Show,” heard nationwide. Send in your letters and Shirley Strawberry will dish out the necessary advice. Today’s topic: High standards I am a beautiful, shy, intelligent 27-year-old virgin who recently ended a 6-month-long relationship with my boyfriend that I met online. I started online dating again and communicated with this guy that we have a lot of shared interest. The conversation was good until we started talking about our views on premarital sex. I told him that I wanted to wait until I was married to have sex of any kind. He told me that most men want sex and that he needs to feel close to the person that he is in a relationship with. His previous relationship ended because his girlfriends stop having sex with him. He told me that he respects my views, so he feels our relationship would not work. I told my mother the situation and she agreed with the guy. She jokingly hinted that I should have premarital sex or I might end up alone. She said that it is rare to find a man that would wait until marriage to have sex. Is this true and are my standards set too high? My mother also thinks that I will be missing out on a good guy for me if I do not start sleeping with these guys before marriage. I am confused, and I dont know what to think. I fear that I might end up alone if I don’t change my views. Society glorifies premarital sex and looks down on you if you are a virgin at a certain age. I read your book and I know you said that guys like standards but is my standard unreasonable? Thank you.
- “Strawberry Letters” are letters sent from fans of the “Steve Harvey Morning Show” and therefore do not express the sentiments of ESSENCE Magazine or ESSENCE.com. As these are fan letters, we have left them as close to their original form as possible.