Every January, we’re told this is the year we’ll finally “get our money together.” New budget. New app. New level of discipline. And yet, by February—or sooner—most of those plans quietly fall apart. It’s not because you’re lazy or bad with money. It’s because most financial plans aren’t built for real life.
Start With Facts, Not Feelings
“Most ‘new year, new you’ budgets fail because they’re built on feelings instead of facts,” says Nadia Vanderhall, founder of The Brands and Bands Strategy Group. Financial feelings can lull us into a comfy denial about overspending:
“I don’t eat out that much.”
“My spending isn’t that bad.”
“I should be able to make this work.”
In other cases, they can also lead us to creating restrictive budgets based on perceived scarcity. “Budgets built around restrictions instead of real life aren’t sustainable,” says Bola Sokunbi, author and founder of Clever Girl Finance. “A sustainable budget gives people flexibility and permission, including room for enjoyment, mistakes, and adjustments, so when something unexpected happens, the whole plan doesn’t fall apart.”
Knowing your true numbers solves the budgeting problems for both. “When you actually pull the data, the story is different,” says Vanderhall. “A budget that works doesn’t ask you to become a different person. It asks you to understand who you already are.”
Start this process by slowing down and getting honest, engaging in what Vanderhall calls “an audit of your wallet:”
First, pull your last 30–60 days of statements. “Your bank and credit card statements don’t lie. They show how much your life really costs—not just bills, but food runs, convenience spending, and all the little daily choices that add up fast,” explains Vanderhall.
Next, separate spending into two categories. The first is bills and obligations. The second is life costs, which includes money spent on pleasure: eating out, fun, convenience, and being “outside.” Get especially granular with life costs. This is where lifestyle creep often happens, and where we tend to underestimate our spending.
Finally, track your cash flow. Tracking cash flow gives you insight into not only how much money comes in and goes out on a monthly basis, but also when it occurs, thus flagging what Vanderhall calls “pinch points,” or times of the month when there is little or no cash flow.
Debt Doesn’t Define You
Part of building wealth involves eliminating debt, especially high-interest consumer debt, but some of us find it difficult to move past the numbers. Before creating a plan of attack, it’s important to get your head in the game: “Debt is a math problem, not a moral failure,” says Vanderhall. “Your debt doesn’t define you. It’s a snapshot of where you are—not who you are.”
Once your mindset is in place, the next step is taking concrete actions that move your numbers in the right direction. Vanderhall and Sokunbi suggests leveraging your budget while being intentional and reducing costs, securing additional streams of income, and advocating for yourself:
Negotiate a Rate
Calling your credit card company or lender to negotiate a lower interest rate can reduce the total you pay over time. Even a small drop in your rate can free up cash to pay down debt faster or add to savings. It’s a simple move that can make a noticeable difference without changing your spending habits.
Consolidate
Consolidating multiple debts into a single loan or credit card can simplify payments and sometimes lower your interest rate. This reduces mental load and helps you focus on one clear plan instead of juggling multiple due dates. It’s especially helpful if you’re feeling overwhelmed or struggling to keep track of everything.
Explore Hardship Programs
If bills or debt payments feel unmanageable, many lenders, credit cards, and utilities offer hardship programs. These programs can give temporary relief, like paused payments or reduced interest, giving you breathing room to get back on track. Even just knowing your options can reduce stress and help you make smarter financial decisions.
Get a Side Hustle
A side hustle is extra income outside your main job, and when used intentionally, it can accelerate your financial goals. You can direct this money toward debt payoff. The key is to treat it as purposeful income—not “fun money”—so it works toward building your financial future.
You Need to Play the Long Money Game, Too
And while mastering day-to-day money habits sets the foundation, a truly sustainable money plan also protects your future and builds wealth over time. The first step to actively growing your wealth is planning for retirement no matter how much you earn. “A realistic retirement plan should focus on diversification, consistency, and flexibility,”says Patrina Dixon, CFEI and founder of It’s My Money. Contributing to these accounts are especially beneficial for those with a late start to long-term financial planning:
- Employer 401(k): Contribute at least enough to get the full employer match—free money is free money.
- High-Yield Savings Account (HYSA): Automate deposits to build liquidity and emergency funds, reducing the need to tap investments during setbacks.
- Roth IRA: Contributions are made after-tax, but qualified withdrawals in retirement are tax-free—offering flexibility later.
- Non-Retirement Brokerage Account: These accounts offer greater flexibility, fewer restrictions, and easier access than retirement accounts. It allows you to build wealth for today, not just for later in life. You can work with a professional to align investments with your goals, timeline, and risk tolerance.
Wealth Preservation: Insurance
Once you build wealth, you’ll need to protect it. “Insurance helps protect wealth in the event of disability or death by preventing the need to drain liquid assets,” Dixon explains. Insurance essentially acts like a shield for the most important parts of your life:
Health Insurance
Health insurance protects your savings from being wiped out by one medical emergency. While many people get coverage through their jobs, it’s important to have a plan that moves with you—especially during career changes, caregiving seasons, or entrepreneurship.
Disability Insurance
Disability insurance protects your income if illness or injury prevents you from working. For many Black women who are primary earners, protecting income is often more urgent than protecting assets.
Life Insurance
Life insurance ensures your loved ones aren’t left carrying your financial responsibilities. It can cover final expenses, replace income, and protect the future you’re building.
Renters or Homeowners Insurance
This coverage protects what you’ve worked hard to build—your home and belongings. One unexpected event shouldn’t force you to start over financially.
The Wealth is Transferring. This is NOT a Drill.
We’re in the middle of the Great Wealth Transfer. Baby Boomers—born between 1946 and 1964—are passing down trillions of dollars to Gen X (1965–1980) and Millennials (1981–1996). For Black women, this moment is both an opportunity and a risk. Even with smart investing, without the right systems in place to transfer this wealth, wealth that took generations to build can be lost, misdirected, or fumbled entirely. “Without the right documents, the state decides what happens to your assets—not you.” warns Dixon.
How to Transfer Wealth the Sustainable Way
Create a will or trust
A will outlines how your assets are distributed after you pass, but it goes through probate, which can be time-consuming and public. A trust can move assets outside of probate, offering privacy and faster access for your heirs—and many people benefit from having both. Together, they give you control and peace of mind, knowing your family and loved ones are taken care of.
Update beneficiary designations
Keep retirement accounts and insurance policies current so the right people receive your assets when the time comes. Even small oversights can create confusion or unnecessary stress for your loved ones.
Document instructions clearly
Write down your wishes in a way that’s easy to follow, leaving no room for guesswork. Clear instructions help prevent disagreements and protect both your family and your legacy.
Balance Without Burnout
Taking the necessary steps to build and protect your wealth isn’t about doing everything perfectly or all at once. Your daily habits—the budgets you honor, the small wins on debt, and the consistent contributions and investments into estate planning, savings, debt elimination, insurance, and investing—aren’t just numbers on a page. It’s peace and it’s freedom for you and the people you love.
Kara Stevens is the founder of The Frugal Feminista and author of heal your relationship with money and Unmasking the Strong Black Woman.