Finding Love At An Older Age

Tips For Dating At An Older Age

Looking for love in your 40s, 50s and beyond can seem tough. You think, “If it’s anything like how crazy dating in my 20’s was, I’m making a run for it.” However, with a positive attitude and little help from online dating sites and your friends dating in your more mature years can be fun and validating. If you’ve been out of the scene for a while, you may not know where to begin. Get back in the saddle with these helpful tips.

Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

Taking on an adventurous spirit is one of the first ways to welcome the possibility of new love into your life says Dr. Pepper Shwartz, author of “Prime: Adventures and Advice On Sex , Love and the Sensual Years.” “Having an adventure means moving a little over the edge of your comfort zone and that can vary from taking yourself out to a movie and dinner, to wearing significantly tighter jeans, to trying a nude beach. The result? Excitement, pleasure at your own cheekiness, and the possibility of new opportunities presenting themselves when you exceed known territory.”

Phone a Friend

Networking is not just for landing that amazing new job anymore. If you want to find love, you’ve got to let people know that you’re available. Call all of your friends–and we do mean all of them–and ask them to set you up on a date. Rachel Greenwald, author of “Find a Husband After 35” goes as far as to suggest that you write a list of all the people you know, from the guy who cuts your lawn to the guy who cuts your hair and then cold call them. It’s not being desperate. It’s being proactive.

Log On

According to US News, the 50 and up age group is taking internet dating by storm. This means, you’ll be in good company. “The internet is one of the most efficient and safe ways to find romance,” Dr. Schwartz writes. “You get a lot more information about someone you’ve just met in cyberspace than you do in most other kinds of one-time contact.”

To make internet dating work for you, stay on top of it. Give creating and checking up on your profile as much attention to detail as you would your resume.

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Get Help From Your Kids

If you’ve been out of the game for a while you might need a refresher course on what’s out there. Look to your kids or your younger co-workers for pointers from where to go for a fun first date to what to say to make sure he asks you out again. Also, it’s almost guaranteed that one of your child’s friends will have a single dad due to the divorce rate. Suggest that they to set you up on a date.

Be Optimistic

If you don’t think you’re going to find love, then you won’t. That’s why it’s imperative that you keep a positive attitude. You don’t have to hope that Mr. Right will be standing in front of your doorstep with a bouquet of roses and a bottle of champagne every time you step outside, but do be optimistic that he could be right around the corner.

Stay Centered

The single ladies out there will tell you, the game is not always easy. You may find that while you’re networking and joining dating Websites, you’re not having much luck finding a partner. While you’re doing what you have to do, it’s important to stay “physically awake” Dr. Schawtz says. “There are phases in life when a woman can’t find a lover who meets her standards,” she writes. “But that doesn’t mean you start to wither and dry up. Women can stay physically awake through all kinds of options: massage, pilates, working out.”

Narrow Things Down

Often, the older we get, the longer our list of requirements for a good mate gets. It’s time to shave some of that critera off. “…Take your list of the twenty things you want most in a man and then just look for the top three or four,” Dr. Schwartz writes.