As professional matchmakers we frequently poll single women on the types of men they most often encounter, and what they love most about them. These are the top 10 characteristics they find in single men with potential in their dating arsenal and what we want single women to consider when encountering these guys.
He is the man that encourages you and you share your dreams and aspirations with. He listens to you and holds you accountable along with offering the motivation you need to succeed. He is also there to celebrate your wins, almost like the cheerleader who is always in your corner saying, “I knew you could do it!” The great thing about Mr. Encourager is he will always sing your praises. What you don’t want to do however is base your relationship solely on the push because down the line if you start a family or take a step back from the climb, he could be turned off or get bored.
This is the man that you may have that amazing chemistry with who makes your heart flutter and your heart race anytime he’s around. The pros of this man is that you know you’re physically attracted to him and it can only get better with time. The challenge however with Mr. Pleaser is if you act on it too soon, your judgement can be clouded so easily and before you know it, you think you’re in love. When in fact, if you take the intimacy away, you realize that you may or may not have other things in common. This one is tricky and we always recommend imagining life with him without the strong physical attraction and chemistry and see what’s left to solidify a long-term relationship.
He loves to wine and dine you. He takes you to the finest establishments and vacations of a lifetime. He also makes great business decisions and without a doubt you know you can have a secure quality of life together. He is also there to help and support you in a pinch when you need him. The down side to this being the focal point is life has its ups and downs so if hard times arise and say he loses his job or for some reason is no longer able to do the things he once did, does he have the ability and drive to bounce back and reinvent himself? Or will he crash and burn? So short-term, it’s fun. If you’re considering a long-term relationship, that ability to grind just in case is a must!
He makes you feel safe and secure. He’s a leader and people respect him. You look up to him with admiration and if anything were to jump off……you’re good! What we would challenge you to do in this instance is not only associate Mr. Protector to a man who is 6’1 and above since the average man in the U.S. is 5’9. But rather look for other qualities in a single guy at any height who can make you feel safe for instance, calling to make sure you arrived home or taking the initiative to solve a problem in your life and he does it with such intelligence and authority. Mr. Protector can be found in so many different ways.
He is the man that you call when you have an extra ticket to the game or a concert because you are guaranteed to have a great time with lots of laughs. Usually there is no romantic chemistry with the two of you but you keep him in your “just in case” box because you enjoy each other’s company and often neither of you want to go places alone. Mr. Homeboy is fun and will usually put you in the “friend-zone” and vice versa if that’s how you start the relationship out. So just be honest with yourself and be assured that there’s no interest in something more because it’s often harder to backtrack and try to become a girlfriend later after he’s used to just having a good time together. If you think you just might like him, keep the door open and flirt a bit throughout so he’s aware there’s a possibility that you want to keep him for yourself.
He stimulates you mentally! You have hours and hours of conversation about politics, world events, international travel and foreign policy. There’s never a dull moment as you both discover something new in every conversation and it’s a welcomed workout for your brain. Again we can’t say it enough, this man may just put you in the friend zone if you don’t break it up sometimes and show him the relaxed fun side that we all have. At the end of the day, you want him to envision his life with you long term and not only as a contender for The Great Debate!
He is the one who can not only repair any and everything but he can even make it better and more efficient. Whether he can do it himself or always has a solution, you keep him near because life is so much easier when he’s just a phone call away. Plus watching him come up with the solution is Oh so sexy! With Mr. Fix It just make sure you’re being vocal about how much you appreciate his efforts. After a while it’s easy to routinely say, I’ll just call Johnny. But after a while he can get resentful of your calls if you act like it’s something he’s supposed to do and before you know it, Mr. Fix It is off fixing things for the one who is telling him how smart and awesome he is!
He is the one who you can connect with on a spiritual level. Whether you can pray together, keep each other uplifted, or even use your spirituality as a guide to keep the two of you on the same moral page, it’s something that keeps you both grounded and a compass you use to navigate life together. This is such a wonderful quality, but what we hear from men is sometimes women will allow the spiritual connection to take over and not offer anything else in the relationship. Just make sure you’re still being spontaneous, flirty, and fun along with your faith and we can tell you, it will all go a long way.
He is the one who is down to try anything with you, whether it’s running a marathon, sky diving, trying a new cuisine, rock climbing, hiking, jet skiing, etc. If you suggest it, his answer is always YES. This man is sometimes hard to find so you keep him close because you know he is a diamond in the rough. Again with Mr. Adventurous make sure you do your part in suggesting new things to try so that you keep his attention. And also throw in some other things you like to do together as well because again as life is very unpredictable, health issues, start of a family, pressures of work, etc. could shift and you have to have some other things in common as well to keep this relationship interesting.
He is the one who represents you well at all functions, whether personal or professional. He is the perfect gentleman and arrives with you looking great, knows how to mingle and compliment you in front of your friends or peers, can have great conversation no matter the setting, and cleans up oh so well. The challenge with Mr. Perfect Date we hear often is that every other woman in the room is smiling at him too. So you have to be confident and he needs to be the type who handles attention well where he’s not easily swayed by a nice smile and curvy hips when you leave to go to the ladies room.
Yes, these are the top 10 characteristics that single women will often encounter, but of course there are many more. Remember when you meet someone new or if you’re already dating someone, think of what’s important to you. Remember this is the year of NO MORE MISSED OPPORTUNITIES and we’re always rooting for you. Here’s to LOVE!
Fisher Gilmore Matchmaking is an exclusive agency of “heart hunters” led by The Matchmaking DUO™ (Kelli Fisher & Tana Gilmore). They provide matchmaking services personally designed to accommodate busy, successful professionals who are seeking long-term love. They pride themselves on giving their clients a lot of what they want, and even more of what they need. For more advice from them visit their site or follow them on Facebook or Twitter.