I was excited to share this post with you, ladies. Like it or not, your boyfriend has lied to you on more than one occasion. But now, before you jump to any conclusions, I need you to hear me out: There are sometimes things he wishes he could tell you but he feels you just can’t handle. Therefore, you get the filtered version. But truthfully, total honesty is what will really bring you both closer to you, so I asked a group of men to sit down with me and talk about all the things they “wish” they could say to their woman’s face. These are their top answers.
Nothing in life stays the same. That includes our bodies. If you noticed the change, of course he did too. That doesn’t mean he has a problem with it. Many of us like when our women add on some “bonus” weight. We see it as an enhancement to what was already there. So relax. You being comfortable in your own skin will always be the ultimate turn-on.
Whether you wear it short, long, natural or with a little something extra added in there, he definitely takes an interest in your hair. Now, it is your hair; do with it as you please. There are times, however, when he would like to have a little input without being the bad guy and simply have the liberty to say, “Babe that’s not my favorite style on you!”
Yes, there will be times he’s looking forward to your “girl’s night out” just as much as you are – but you shouldn’t be offended. It isn’t that he doesn’t want to spend time with you. He does; he just doesn’t want to spend all of his time with you. Your ability to have a social life outside of your time together makes you even more attractive. You’ll never be one of the guys, and that’s perfectly okay. (He doesn’t need another homeboy.) What he needs is for you to be his woman. That’s what gives him balance.
When you’re asking a man if he misses you and you only just left his house, sometimes he’s tempted to tell the truth and say, “Not Really.” Give him a chance to miss you. Let him say it and show it when he’s ready and the result will be far more rewarding. At times, a little space will help fuel the passion and keep the fire going.
He is never going to enjoy your friends as much as you do. They’re your friends for a reason. While he may genuinely like them, and he should, there will be times where he just wants to bow out and let you hang out with them without him having to sit through all those inside conversations about shoes and work drama and stories he can’t keep up with.
When you call him just after midnight on a Tuesday and ask him if he’s asleep, but before he can answer you start talking, and talking and talking, he really wants to hang up. In fact, if you were anybody else he would hang up. If it’s not an emergency, cut him some slack sometimes and let him get his beauty rest too.
You may be the fashionista, but every now and then your man has a critique or two – even if he doesn’t voice it at the time. That generic head nod he gives you when you ask if you look good is really his conscious effort not to kill your vibe. Sometimes he just wants to say “babe, I hate It” without you taking it as an insult or mood killer. Some looks will inevitable appeal to him more to him than others and you want him to feel comfortable telling the truth about which is which.
There will be times when he just wants to stay home. Sitting on the couch with his favorite food and beverage of choice can be heaven on earth for a man. He knows this can’t happen all the time. But when the moment is right, it can be just as fun to kick it in the crib and just enjoy each other without the outside noise. (Plus, it can be a real money-savor too.)
Please note than I mean no offense here and I’m going to tread carefully h. Yes, there are times when he notices some changes in your figure that could be potentially be alleviated by a few good cardio classes. (And he may feel the same about his own weight gain.) With that said, he has no right to encourage you to hit the gym if he never goes. If it’s something he desires to do together with you, you should at least give it a try – especially if fitness is super important to him. Adding that dynamic to your relationship could make things more exciting.
You know that dish you make him because it’s his favorite? Well, it is his favorite, when his Mom makes it. It’s great that you want to learn how to make that specialty meal for just for him and I’m sure he appreciates the gesture. But, as my poker-playing uncle once said, “Sometimes you have to know when to hold ‘em, and when to fold ‘em.”