• Celebrity
    • Of The Essence
    • Celebrity News
    • If Not For My Girls
    • The State Of R&B
    • Time Of Essence
  • Fashion
    • 2023 Best In Black Fashion Awards
    • 2023 Fashion House
    • Red Carpet
    • Fashion News
    • Accessories
  • Beauty
    • Girls United: Beautiful Possibilities
    • 2023 Best In Black Beauty
    • Skin
    • Makeup
    • Nails
    • Hair
  • Lifestyle
    • Love
    • Parenting
    • Relationships
    • Bridal Bliss
    • Lifestyle News
    • Health & Wellness
    • ESSENCE Eats
    • Travel
    • Food & Drink
  • Entrepreneurship
    • Money & Career
  • News
    • Latest News
    • Paint The Polls Black
    • Culture
    • Politics
  • Shopping
  • Video
  • Events
    • 2023 Fashion House
    • 2023 ESSENCE Festival Of Culture
    • 2023 Wellness House
    • 2023 Black Women In Hollywood
    • 2023 ESSENCE Film Festival
    • 2023 HOLLYWOOD HOUSE
  • Studios
  • Girls United

WHERE BLACK CULTURE, COMMUNITY AND CONSCIOUSNESS MEET

Sign up for ESSENCE Newsletters the keep the Black women at the forefront of conversation.

Your email is required.
Your email is in invalid format.
Confirm email is required.
Email did not match.
Select the newsletters you'd like to receive:
Please select at least one option.
By clicking Subscribe Now, you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.
Skip to content
SUBSCRIBE
  • MAGAZINE
  • NEWSLETTER
  • Celebrity
    • Of The Essence
    • Celebrity News
    • If Not For My Girls
    • The State Of R&B
    • Time Of Essence
  • Fashion
    • 2023 Best In Black Fashion Awards
    • 2023 Fashion House
    • Red Carpet
    • Fashion News
    • Accessories
  • Beauty
    • Girls United: Beautiful Possibilities
    • 2023 Best In Black Beauty
    • Skin
    • Makeup
    • Nails
    • Hair
      • Hair News
      • Natural
      • Relaxed
      • Transitioning
      • Weave
      • 4C
  • Lifestyle
    • Love
    • Parenting
    • Relationships
    • Bridal Bliss
    • Lifestyle News
    • Health & Wellness
    • ESSENCE Eats
    • Travel
    • Food & Drink
  • Entrepreneurship
    • Money & Career
  • News
    • Latest News
    • Paint The Polls Black
    • Culture
    • Politics
  • Shopping
  • Video
  • Events
    • 2023 Fashion House
    • 2023 ESSENCE Festival Of Culture
    • 2023 Wellness House
    • 2023 Black Women In Hollywood
    • 2023 ESSENCE Film Festival
    • 2023 HOLLYWOOD HOUSE
  • Studios
  • Girls United
Home · Love & Sex

Men on What Defines Cheating

What Men Think: What Defines Cheating?
By · Updated October 29, 2020
01
The Truth About Cheating

With infidelity hot in the headlines from professional athletes to elected officials, we took to the streets to see what men really think about cheating, as our expert weighs in.

Men on What Defines Cheating
Getty
02
The Expert

Author, radio host and relationship expert Zo Williams breaks down the psychology of cheating.

“Men cheat because we feel society wants us to. Cheating is a manifestation of greed, and we live in a greedy society. Men want to settle down once they are tired and have gotten that animal hunt out of their systems, which is what attracts many women in the first place.”

Men on What Defines Cheating
Courtesy of Zo Williams
03
Samuel P., 46, Banking

“If you have a girlfriend and go to lunch with someone else, that’s not cheating. If there’s no sex, that’s not cheating. If it’s an open relationship and you’ve established seeing other people, that’s not cheating. When you’re not married, you’re still somewhat single.”

Men on What Defines Cheating
Charreah Jackson
04
Walter R., 27, Music Executive

“As guys we don’t call it cheating among ourselves and refer to her as a friend. I don’t cheat. It’s a waste of time. If I want to be with someone else, I will let that be known and move on.”

Men on What Defines Cheating
Charreah Jackson
05
Marvin S., 30s, Marketing

“You can be cheating and not know it. It’s emotional when you have intimacy with someone that isn’t your significant other. I’m friends with many women and guys come from another world, where they can break up with you Friday, have a date Saturday, get back with you Sunday and not feel that was cheating.”

Men on What Defines Cheating
06
Dave G., 36, Banking

“In a relationship you have to be honest. There’s no excuses for cheating. If we’re together and someone else is feeling you up, or you go out with a guy I don’t know about, that’s cheating.”

Men on What Defines Cheating
Charreah Jackson
07
Benjamin S., 48, Mortgage Banking

“I’ve been married 28 years and it gets better with time. My wife knows there are women who don’t respect our marriage and we work to keep us strong. If I cheated my wife would probably forgive me, but I would have to start all the way over building her trust. A quick fling isn’t worth your relationship. It’s wrong too if you knowingly are involved with someone who is in a relationship.”

Men on What Defines Cheating
08
Raymond T., 21, Student

“Technology makes cheating easier, and easier to get caught with texts, e-mail and live chats. Facebook gets people caught a lot! Women look at cheating logically, but men manipulate it so they look like they aren’t doing anything, when they know they’re wrong.”

Men on What Defines Cheating
09
Harry A., 45, Administration

“Cheating is like playing the lottery—you take that chance. Women mature faster than men, so it takes us longer to get it out of our system up into our 30s and 40s sometimes. And with men in power, like professional athletes, they may not ever want to settle down.

Men on What Defines Cheating
10
Jason G., 31, Internet Technology

“The older you get your perspective on cheating changes. You realize it’s just not the physical that is wrong, but emotional too. I’ve been caught cheating and learned from that. Technology has changed things a lot, so texts, e-mail and social networks play a part as well.”

Men on What Defines Cheating
Charreah Jackson
COMPANY INFORMATION
  • Our Company
  • Customer Service
  • Essence Ventures
  • Change Your Address
  • Contact Us
  • Job Opportunities
  • Internships
  • Media Kit
  • tag
SUBSCRIBE
  • Newsletters
  • Give a Gift of ESSENCE
  • Magazine Tablet Edition
FOLLOW US
MORE ON ESSENCE
  • Home
  • Love
  • Celebrity
  • Beauty
  • Hair
  • Fashion
  • ESSENCE festival

ESSENCE.com is part of ESSENCE Communications, Inc.

Essence may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Offers may be subject to change without notice.

©2023 ESSENCE Communications Inc. All Rights Reserved. | Privacy Policy | Terms of Use | Essence.com Advertising Terms

Get The ESSENCE Newsletter and
Special Offers delivered to your inbox

By clicking Sign Up, you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Get The ESSENCE Magazine
by subscribing below
subscribe now