The Best Clapbacks to Those Awkward Relationship Status Questions You Get Over The Holidays

K. Natasha Dec, 12, 2017

‘Tis the season of family, food, friends, fellowship— and loved ones bombarding you with questions about your relationship status (or lack thereof). For women, holidays are universal life markers, particularly for relationships. From Thanksgiving to Valentine’s Day – your relationship status can feel like it’s on display for all. And as if you don’t spend enough time questioning your romantic future, how you’re most fulfilled, or where you want your next relationship to go, those pesky nags (otherwise referred to as ‘relatives’), don’t do anything to relieve holiday stress.

And whether you’re in a relationship, or you’re not, there are always going to be those awkward moments where your family just doesn’t know when or how to fall back and leave things be. If the thought of answering these inevitable relationship questions is already stressing you out, we suggest you go into holidays armed with a plan (and a few clapbacks handy for when that glass of wine just isn’t enough).

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This is a sensitive one for some, so you can shut them down easily by saying, “I’d prefer to keep the business about my uterus, my own. Thanks.” Or to leave them stumped you can even try, “Who said that I wanted to have kids?”

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Since they wanted to try and come for you, you can come back with this quick-wit response, “Aren’t you tired of being in my business?”

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Here you can respond in two ways. By simply saying, “When the time is right,” or if you haven’t even quite gotten there with your boo yet, be truthful, “This isn’t a discussion that we’ve had with one another, so you’re making it awkward by trying to have us discuss it with you.

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“You don’t think I’m worthy of being treated like a queen?” or “I’m not willing to compromise on my happiness.” These will both throw them for a loop, because of course their baby girl shouldn’t be with just any and every ol’ body.

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To take from the book of Rihanna, you can simply respond by saying, “I’m happy and I’m single, if that’s what you’re really asking.”

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“Like you’re trying to hold that ponytail together?” Actually, don’t say this one. But you’ll definitely probably think it. For the ignorance of this question, simply take the higher road by just smiling and nodding.