Tika Sumpter is stepping into her author era, releasing her first children’s book, and if that sounds surprising, you haven’t been paying attention.
The 44-year-old mama has been dominating in the children’s and parenting space for the last few years, from starring as Maddie, or Sonic’s mom, in the box-office franchise Sonic the Hedgehog, to creating the podcast Adventures of Curiosity Cove for kids, now in its second season, and co-hosting a past parenting podcast called The Suga and creating the platform SugaBerry for mothers.
So it makes sense that the star just released the book I Got It From My Mama, inspired by her 9-year-old daughter, Ella Loren. Sumpter wanted to create more literary content that centers young girls of color. In addition, she also wanted to address the overstimulation mothers feel that can sometimes lead them to snap at their children, a behavior their kids may end up emulating with their peers. Hence the title!
When that happens, can you say “I’m sorry”? Sumpter, like many of us, was raised by parents who rarely, if ever, apologized for regrettable moments with their kids, and she hopes to help today’s mamas and papas do things differently by taking the lead in being an accountable parent, rearing an accountable child.
“I am raising her to really just be a kind human being who can take responsibility in the world, apologize, and hopefully connect with other people who are like-minded and want things to be better.”
Sumpter is also raising Ella to embrace her unique beauty. The former Mixed-ish star shares her with husband Nicholas James, who is white. “Raising a little girl who is biracial, I think she hasn’t really totally grasped the whole black-white thing,” she shares. “I just try to keep an eye on what she’s into, whether it’s her friends’ hair, because my daughter’s hair is dirty blonde. And her friend will be like, ‘Oh, your hair is not as golden as mine.’ And she’s like, ‘No.’ For me, I pour into my daughter, and I’m like, your hair is beautiful. You’re gorgeous. You’re smart. All those things so that when she goes out into the world, if somebody does say something, she’s confident.”
The actress also understands the need to pour into herself so those moments of lashing out are rare. Her favorite form of self-care is alone time. It doesn’t have to be anything elaborate. Sumpter simply appreciates some space and some quiet.
“I tell my husband, and I tell my daughter when I need a minute,” she says. “I can’t have you talk to me anymore. Don’t touch me right now. I say it nicely, but I’m like, I just need a moment, and I need it to be quiet. Literally, I take a step back and say that, and they get it. They’d rather me be that way than I’m snapping. They understand when I am overwhelmed with just the environment at the moment, and then we move on. They know I’m going to come back to them.”
Sumpter, who says she inherited grit and determination as great qualities from her mother, as well as admitting she also inherited an occasional inability to listen as a not-so-great one, has taken the lessons she’s learned from her mom and the relationship they had, and applies that to her parenting journey. While she is passing down that essential endurance and spirit from her mother, Sumpter is also encouraging Ella to have a bigger voice than she was able to have growing up. Being able to say sorry to Ella when necessary and encourage her to do the same for others, is part of that.
“My upbringing informs the type of mother I am, and I feel like I’m half old-school, half new-school modern. I think a lot of parents think, oh, apologies, that means they lose some power over their child, but I think it’s the opposite,” she says. “You’re giving them power to help them. But the old school in me, there are still boundaries set. There’s still the look. “Girl…you know…” But the new school in me is asking questions, and actually listening to what those answers are.”
I Got It From My Mama is available now, wherever books are sold. Check out our full conversation with Tika Sumpter above.