Our society can make us feel like if we’re not the perfect parents, our children won’t have the “better life” we’re all striving for them to have. Girlfriend, cut yourself some slack. Yahoo Shine came up with a list of ways to “stop being a ‘perfect’ mom and start being a real, true-to-you great one.”

Ask What Really Matters to Your Family. Karen Maezen Miller, author of Mom Zen, says, “Let go of the idea that you have to be all things to all people.” Ask your family what’s important to them and make those things your priorities.

Make Mistakes on Purpose. Author Ann L. Dunnewold tells Yahoo Shine mommies to “purposely make mistakes or leave tasks undone…You’ll find that it’s not the disaster you fear.” Really, what’s the worst that could happen if you put the baby’s shirt on backwards or leave dishes in the sink overnight?

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Try a Mantra. When your head starts to spin, it’s time to whip out that mantra that you wrote down to get you grounded again. Try this one from Dunnewold: “I’m a mommy, not a martyr, I’m only human, I make mistake; Control what I can, let go of the rest.”

Do Something Nice for Yourself. Miller tells Yahoo Shine to spend less time “obsessing over our parenting skills.” She suggests checking out of mommy-mode and doing something nice for yourself. We suggest you make these self-care treats a routine thing.

Acknowledge What You Can Accomplish Today. Stop freaking out about all the stuff you didn’t get done and pat yourself on the back for the things that you did accomplish. Dunnewold suggests that you “write a ‘did do’ list at the end of the day, including the hugs given, tears, brushed away, carpool runs, driven, baths completed.”

View the whole list at Yahoo Shine.