How often do you become aroused by yourself? Earlier this year, we spoke about the edging trend and how individuals can experience mind-blowing orgasms. Edging involves delaying orgasm to prolong the experience of high sexual arousal. This new trend, called “Gooning,” is similar to the sexual practice of edging, but gooning takes pleasure to the next level. When we talk about pleasure, especially as Black women, we’re often taught to perform it, restrict it, or justify it, not to surrender to it fully. However, the rising trend of “gooning out” is pushing all of that aside.
So, what is Gooning?
According to Nikquan Lewis, sex expert, gooning is a deep, often hours-long (even days-long) masturbation session where you enter a trance-like state, completely lost in the sensations of pleasure. It’s not about orgasm, it’s about surrender. The body is relaxed, the mind is in a meditative state, and the goal is to exist in arousal, not chase orgasm.
“It’s intense. It’s primal. And it can feel like you’re slipping into another mental state where time, stress, and expectations don’t exist, and all that’s left is sensation. People often use porn or audio/visual stimulation to get into the zone, but the focus is on full-body presence. Gooning is sometimes loud, still, occasionally messy, but always about letting go of control and being present with your body in the moment,” Lewis says.
What’s the Difference Between Gooning and Edging?
Edging is like flirting with your orgasm, teasing it, building it up, then pulling back until you’re ready to explode. And you get an excellent release when done well. But Gooning isn’t chasing the orgasm at all. It’s about soaking in the build-up for as long as you can without seeking release. You’re not trying to finish; you’re trying to stay in that zone. It’s the pleasure marathon you didn’t know you needed. You might never orgasm during this session. And that’s the point.
Why This Matters for Us:
Because Black women are tired of surviving pleasureless lives, we’ve been taught to be quiet about our desires. To hurry up and get it over with. To see pleasure as optional. And that silence creates and fuels shame. “Shame disconnects us from our bodies. Shame ruins relationships. Shame convinces us to play small, even in our own bedrooms. Gooning is one way to take your power back and say: I deserve pleasure, and I don’t have to wait on anyone to receive it,” says Lewis.
How to Try Gooning at Home
If you’re curious about trying it, here’s how to set yourself up for a fabulous and intentional experience:
*Set the mood. Make the space sensual and safe. Turn on your playlist, dim the lights, light a candle, roll the shoulders back. Whatever helps you get into your body.
*Get your supplies ready. You’ll want plenty of your favorite lube, charge your favorite toys, have water ready to stay hydrated, and towels. No interruptions. You don’t want to break this pleasure trance looking for batteries.
*Bring your visuals (or whatever turns you on). A lot of Goonettes use porn. Some use erotica. Some use nothing. Your choice. Just make sure it keeps you present and turned on.
*Be patient. This isn’t a quickie, sis. Let your body lead. Follow sensation, not expectation. You’re not trying to “get there.” You’re just being there.
*Pack your self-control. Don’t go chasing orgasm. Gooning is about staying in it, not finishing it. The longer you sit in that pleasure, the deeper you go. Feel everything. Don’t rush.
*Know there are whole communities for this.
Gooners and Goonettes are out here living their best lives. If you want to explore this as kink or practice, there are spaces for that too. You are not alone.
Now! As beautiful as this can be, everything needs boundaries. That includes pleasure. Gooning can be great, but if it turns into an obsession or an escape, it can bring its own set of challenges:
- Overstimulation can dull your natural pleasure response
- You might start needing more extreme stimulation to feel aroused
- It can become a negative coping mechanism, an escape from real-life stress or intimacy
- You may feel disconnected from partners or avoid intimacy that feels “less intense” than Gooning
There’s nothing wrong with this practice, but moderation and mindfulness matter. Pleasure should be expansive, not isolating. Suppose it starts to impact your day-to-day, your decisions negatively. In that case, it takes over your time, your energy, your emotional capacity, or causes issues in your relationships; that’s a signal to check in with yourself and/or with a therapist who understands kink and pleasure without judgment.
Gooning reminds us that pleasure isn’t a reward we earn; it’s a language our bodies speak when we listen. It’s not for everyone, but it might just be for you. If nobody ever gave you permission to feel good in your body without guilt, shame, or expectations, consider this. Let yourself explore. Be curious. Be intentional. And remember, pleasure is yours to define. You don’t have to perform for anybody, not even yourself.
It’s ok to get lost in pleasure. Just don’t lose your boundaries in the process.