For The Self Care Lab founder, Imani Murray, she didn’t grow up watching women treating themselves to bouquets of fresh calla lilies or bundles of eucalyptus. A romantic partner sometimes gifted flowers, but in her Queens neighborhood, she certainly wasn’t seeing women gift themselves florals. “I definitely wasn’t seeing my mother buying herself flowers all the time,” Murray says. “And my father would buy my mother flowers here and there.”
It surprised her how much flowers brought her comfort after moving to Atlanta in 2021. They didn’t hold much significance to her previously. “I didn’t really enjoy them,” she recalls. “It wasn’t until I became an adult that I was like, okay, I like this. This is cool.”
Flowers were a gateway to Murray paying attention to what brought her peace. Soon, she was coloring, which soothed her. “It allows me to just separate all the chaos in my mind,” she admits. Eventually, she found that the ritual of strolling through the flower section added a dose of reliable beauty to her routine. “I just noticed how building an arrangement every week just brought so much joy into my space. It allowed me to be calm and be planted where my feet were.”
She picked up the habit of traveling once a week to snag roses, sunflowers, tulips, and more. It was the beginning of her developing a self-care routine. Millennials and Zillennials have been intentional about seeking softness after watching previous generations sacrifice self-care in the service of others. “We’ve seen our mothers, our grandmothers, they’ve done so much, and they are just always so tired,” she shares. “I don’t want to be strong 24/7.” Her routine became such a game-changer that she wanted to help others integrate similar calming practices into their regimen.
Murray started The Self Care Lab in 2024 to create a soft space for others. She stresses the importance of self-care. “It’s a key aspect of life,” she says. “People need spaces where they can be their authentic selves. Be able to pour into themselves and just make time for them, especially in this climate. Now, everybody’s like, go, go, go, because they’re trying to be able to live and make money and just survive, and people are really needing spaces where they can just be calm and relaxed.”
Owner of a creative agency that provides event production and marketing, she pulled together her resources to create those much-needed, restorative spaces. She partnered with vendors on free events that provided floral arranging materials, body work, and other fun activities. Everyone was welcome. “We launched on National Healthcare Day. We had a pop-up. It was totally free here in Atlanta,” she says. “We did a flower bar. We did massages. We had open bar mocktails, wine [and] Black-owned Brands provided some goodies for people to take away.” Brands like Be Rooted, Black Girl Sunscreen and Bevel became involved. It soon expanded to Houston.
She also went on to launch a walking club that fosters a space for fitness and friendship along the Atlanta Beltline on Saturday mornings. “I enjoy walking, but I wanted to do it in community, and I wasn’t seeing Black women specifically where I walked,” says Murray.
This year, The Self Care Lab is embarking on a new adventure, expanding up to the northeast with a New York City Self-Care Summer. It includes a week of events, from a fragrance workshop, a color and sip evening of R&B, and a guided mocktail-making experience. The grand finale will be bringing one of their signature free pop-up events to Brooklyn on August 15. It’s an opportunity to pour into more Black women who need it and expand their understanding of self-care.
“I think a lot of people think self-care is just getting your hair done, getting a massage, getting your nails done,” says Murray, “and it’s really just, what is it that brings you joy?”
Even if coloring and perfume-making isn’t your preferred method for rest, Murray is sharing tips on simple ways you can pour into yourself in the everyday:
Give Yourself Space
Murray believes in the importance of taking the time to withdraw when necessary. “Keeping my phone on silent, that’s one of my favorite things I’ve done in the past couple of years,” she says. A silenced ringer keeps her from becoming “overstimulated.”
Give Yourself a Break
Murray is serious about the power of rest. She proudly announced that the day before our conversation, the only thing she accomplished was restoring her energy. “I was just like, you know, what? I’m just going to lie on the couch and do absolutely nothing,” she recalls. “I’m not gonna respond to anybody. I’m not going to answer any phone calls. I just need time to decompress.”
Give Yourself Grace
It’s tempting to think every day will include some aspect of self-care, but it might not. You might miss a weekly flower run, a walking session, or another part of your routine. Murray recommends forgiving yourself for the times that you fall off. “You’re going to drive yourself crazy, if not,” she says. “You have to allow yourself to give yourself grace.”