The Six Brown Chicks On Repairing Friendships and Pushing Through Your Pain

You saw the women behind the popular lifestyle blog confront each other on Iyanla Vanzant: Fix My Life, and wondered if they got it together when the cameras wrapped. Read what happened after the show and what they learned.

Charli Penn Feb, 01, 2013

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The Six Brown Chicks bloggers: Zondra Hughes, Gina B., Kayann Comeaux, Shoya Bowman, Dawgelene “Dr Dawj” Sangster and Yolanda "Yanni" Brown.

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“Universal sisterhood exists, but the authenticity of that sisterhood depends on the women involved,” says Hughes. “We all have baggage, past dealings with other women that may cause us to act and treat each other a certain way. The Fix My Life study guides are very helpful to crack that code of jealousy, distrust and hidden messages that ultimately drive us to compete and derail each other.” Hear more from Hughes over on her Huffiington Post blog.

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“That time spent with Iyanla was life changing in the most humbling way,” says author Yanni Brown, who runs a blog called Making Love Better Twogether. “One of the biggest lessons learned was that it's not about us but rather what we are purposed to do. Who we are, in our spirit and in our everyday lives, is who shows up in the room. Our voice together is bigger than our individual voices. We are here to serve something and someone so much bigger than ourselves.”

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“I feel more connected to everyone now, and even though there are some that I speak to more than others, it’s not because I feel less for them,” says author and relationship columnist Gina B. “I know what makes each of them tick. I know their tendencies. I know what to expect. I respect them as individuals, and appreciate that we’re each doing all that we can to contribute to our collective endeavors. I have great friends, and I’ve always been committed to maintain my friendships. At the same time, I’m tentative with new people. My greatest challenge is to be more initially accepting of potential new friends.

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“I must be accountable for me and not leaving that responsibility for anyone around me or those I falsely idol,” reveals Kayann Comeaux, a spoken word artist and author. “Sisterhood must be genuine. To feel a sense of sisterhood first comes from self-love and the notion to share that love. Today, I weigh my relationships with women by the sacrifice and the attributes involved. I take an inventory of who I let in and what power I give them. I learned these lessons the hard way but it made an indelible mark on my life.”

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“I learned I was doing and not giving within the group,” says author and playwright Shoya Bowman. “I was going through the motions but I wasn’t giving from my heart. I learned that greed has nothing to do with money. Instead it is taking more than you are willing to give. I learned some of us are head-centered and some are heart-centered. We are all different individuals with very different views but our uniqueness is what makes us unique.”

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“I was in pain just leaving my husband to tape the sessions,” says activist and author Dr. Dawj, who says their friendship is definitely stronger. “He died shortly after the tapings, so seeing the show and knowing that my husband had already died was very difficult. I would always say that I was my sister’s keeper, but I learned I am my sister and when she hurts, I hurt and should help find a way to ease her pain.”

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