NFL Widow Survival Guide

Football Widow Survival Guide
ESSENCE.COM Oct, 25, 2011

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Regardless of the stability of your relationship, Football Season gives you an added sense of security. On game day, you don’t have to worry about your man’s whereabouts. If the game is on, you know exactly where he is, and where to find him. That’s priceless.

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His addiction to the game may not be a bad thing. If you chose not to join him on the sofa, this is a perfect time to plan a girlfriend’s get together. You, other Football Widows, spa day, or shopping sprees, that’s bound to be a winning combination!

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On second thought, would it be so bad to indulge? Perhaps you should join the team. He’d be so proud if you made an effort to learn about the game. Maybe this is the ideal way to spend quality time doing something he enjoys. Trust, he’ll look at you in a completely different light, (With love in his eyes).

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If rooting for his team is simply not an option, when he is in the zone don’t hold it against him. Since his attention is otherwise occupied, nothing you can say or do will interrupt his focus. Recognize the action on the gridiron will temporarily replace his ability to hear or comprehend anything you have to say. Save the deep discussion for another time. While you’re at it, save the negligee for an intimate evening, if you try this tactic while he’s into the game, your feelings might get hurt!

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Don’t take his temporary insanity personal. Use this time to work on you. Perhaps this is a good time to take an afternoon Zumba class. Or you could devote a couple of hours to trying something new, like Stiletto fit. That will eventually be a win-win for you both!

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You may want to consider joining the crowd; statistics indicate more women are tuning in to the NFL. Some 40 percent of the NFL’s fan base is female. Those same stats show that more women tuned in to the Super Bowl than the combined number of men and women who watched the Academy Awards. It’s becoming more apparent that women love the NFL just as much, if not more, than men.

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The league is acknowledging its female presence. There are a series of athletic clothing lines designed with women in mind, check out or the New NFL Pink line at Victoria’s Secret. Also, in October NFL players literally change their colors for a worthy cause. The players are outfitted with pink gloves, pink cleats, and pink chin straps to help raise awareness and funds needed for breast cancer research.

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There’s absolutely no Lifetime during NFL Sunday, please don’t ask him if you can watch something else! Also, there’s no talking or arguing unless it’s about the game! And, don’t expect any dates on Sunday or Monday nights, unless you’re heading to the stadium.

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Your newly found free time during the season is valuable and you should plan accordingly. Perhaps you can switch your dinner club or book club meetings to Sunday afternoons. That way, from kickoff to the last tackle, you are enjoying your own team activities.

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Be patient, the season won’t last forever. But know the timeline, the typical NFL season has four pre-season games, 16 games with one week off (called a “bye” week), followed by up to four playoff games for teams who make the cut. There’s usually another week off, then it’s the Super Bowl. But wait, there’s more: the Pro Bowl, and the Hall of Fame Game. Rest assured, at least college football season is shorter. And there is light at the end of the tunnel, the season will come to an end… eventually!

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Author Pat Tucker’s new book “Football Widows” (out now!) follows the fictional life of NFL B.J. Almond who caught her husband cheating and is hell-bent on getting her revenge.