Modern Day Matchmaker: 10 Reasons He's Not the Man for You

If your boyfriend is raising any of these red flags, it may be time for him to become your ex.

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A few weeks ago, I wrote a piece titled “10 Signs He Has What It Takes to Be Your Husband," and from reading this post, one might think that if their guy doesn’t have those characteristics, he isn't the right guy... period. But, I'm here to tell you that it’s a little more complicated than that. Allow me to explain. Keep reading, and I’ll help you identify 10 ways to recognize that he’s wrong for you.

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If you like the potential of whom he could be, rather than the reality of who he is, he’s just not for you.

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If you act differently around him than you do with your friends and family, you’re in the wrong place. Find someone who lets you be yourself.

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Whatever the issue is, if you are working hard to deny facts about your relationship that you know to be true, then you are dating the wrong person.

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Sorry, I have to be clear with this. If he’s dating, engaged, or married to someone else, he DOES NOT belong to you. 

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Write down the advantages of continuing to date him. Then list the disadvantages. If the latter list wins, it means he is a loss.

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If you’re only with him because you’re afraid of being alone, you can do bad by yourself.

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If you spend your time trying to fix him, please realize this is a fruitless activity. We only have the ability to change ourselves. Let him fix himself, first. He’s wrong for you at this time.   

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If he’s “just too busy” to see you, it means he has higher priorities than you. Let him date himself. 

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If, in order for the relationship to work, you need to cut yourself off from family and friends, you have the wrong guy.

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Our subconscious is trained to guide us, listen to it. If it’s telling you to leave him, it’s time to leave.

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Comments, concerns or questions about my advice? Tell me about it below! Paul Carrick Brunson is a 2013 NAACP Image Award nominee and a 2012 iDate Matchmaker & Relationship Coach Of The Year nominee. His bestselling book It’s Complicated (But It Doesn’t Have to Be) is in stores now. Contact him directly on Facebook or Twitter anytime or visit his website.


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