The geniuses over at the Dear White People movie have created the perfect video for anyone who doesn’t watch Scandal. Just fake it!

With season 4 of Scandal premiering tonight, the “How To Fake That You Watched Scandal” short is the perfect tutorial of basic conversation starters for post-Scandal mornings. Like “Cyrus is crazy,” “Mama Pope is crazy as hell!” or “I can’t believe she cursed him out, made love to him and then cursed him out again.”

So, will you be using these tips, or tuning to Scandal tonight?

Dear White People opens in theaters October 17.