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Articles by: Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux

When Dating Mr. Perfect Goes Wrong
News

When Dating Mr. Perfect Goes Wrong

Don't you hate when you have a couple of dates with a guy you'd be awesome with, only to be totally devastated when he's not interested? Or when you just know that the dude who you kicked it with for a few months is the one for you, but he just refuses to see how amazing you are?

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · Jun 6, 2011
Sound-Off: Mr. Perfect? Girl, You Don't Know Him
News

Sound-Off: Mr. Perfect? Girl, You Don't Know Him

Don't you hate when you have a couple of dates with a guy you'd be awesome with, only to be totally devastated when he's not interested? Or when you just know that the dude who you kicked it with for a few months is the one for you, but he just refuses to see how amazing you are...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · Jun 3, 2011
Ladies Don't Give It Up, Get It Back
News

Ladies Don't Give It Up, Get It Back

Sisters, I have a modest proposal for you today -- never "give" a man "some" ever again...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 27, 2011
5 Questions with VerySmartBrothas.com Creators
News

5 Questions with VerySmartBrothas.com Creators

In 2008, bloggers Panama Jackson and The Champ launched VerySmartBrothas.com, which quickly became one of the Black blogosphere's most popular destinations. Each day, the two wiseguys entertain and enlighten thousands of readers with their musings on men, women, relationships and pop culture. I had the opportunity to sit down with them this week for a brief e-interview, and got a little romantic advice for myself... check it out!

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 26, 2011
Sound-Off: Comparing Yourself is a Losing Game
News

Sound-Off: Comparing Yourself is a Losing Game

If I had been asked as a teenager what my life would look like in my mid-to-late twenties, I would probably have painted a somewhat different picture than what I have going on right now. College grad? Check. Living in New York? Check? Cute boyfriend? Check. Financial stability, a fabulous career and the ability to travel the world? Not so much...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 25, 2011
Sound-Off: There's No Reason to Hate on Oprah
News

Sound-Off: There's No Reason to Hate on Oprah

I am not one of those people who equates "criticizing" or "simply not being a fan" with hatred. You don't have to like Oprah just because she's wildly successful and a global humanitarian. Really, you don't. However, it's impossible to deny the fact that this woman has done a lot to help people across the world, including many of her Black brothers and sisters. Yet some of us just can't find the words to say anything nice about the mogul. But why...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 24, 2011
Sound-Off: Avoid Being the 'Career Single Woman'
News

Sound-Off: Avoid Being the 'Career Single Woman'

Your life should not be greatly defined by what it lacks, but by what it boasts. This is something I struggle with myself when it comes to certain things (*cough* money and a flat stomach *cough*) and I know that I'm not hardly alone. If you are single and wish to be attached, your current situation should not be so much a part of your identity as it is simply a matter of fact. While you go forward in your search for companionship, be cautious as not to become what we'll call her the "Career Single Woman..."

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 22, 2011
Sound-Off: It's Condoms, Or Else!
News

Sound-Off: It's Condoms, Or Else!

It's Friday! For most of us, the work week is almost over and thoughts of good friends, good times and perhaps some good wine are giving us motivation to grind for just a few more hours! Speaking of grinding, the weekend is the perfect time to spend a few lazy (or not so lazy) hours in the bedroom with your honeydip. But while the stresses of work may be behind you for the next few days, the sheets can be an even more frustrating place to be if you're still trying to figure out how to have one of the most important conversations a couple (or any two people having sex) can have: the protection talk...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 19, 2011
Sound-Off: Mr. Perfect Doesn't Exist, But Mr. Right Does
News

Sound-Off: Mr. Perfect Doesn't Exist, But Mr. Right Does

If you are a single woman in search of a partner, you may feel like the entire world has made your "plight" their business. (I prefer "status." "Plight" makes being single sound like a famine of some sort.) If you are a Black single woman, well, we won't go all the way there today, but I'm sure you know the unique ways in which your situation has been treated by writers, members of the media and laypersons — both ill and good-intentioned. It's enough to turn a sane woman mad and to make one feel like wanting to be in love is either some sort of unrealistic goal or some immature desire...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 19, 2011
Sound-Off: When He Won't Give You His All
News

Sound-Off: When He Won't Give You His All

While an out-and-out rejection from a man you like can be painful, there is something a lot more threatening: the part-time lover. He likes you (or so he says) and he may even claim to care about you quite a bit. But he can't commit to a relationship right now. He'll gladly spend some time with you, but you're pretty much beholden to his schedule. When he wants to be there, he's all in. But when he doesn't, your phone calls and texts may go ignored and your requests for quality time, denied...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 17, 2011
Sound-Off: Attacking Black Beauty, Again
News

Sound-Off: Attacking Black Beauty, Again

The war on Black women continues! Yesterday, Psychology Today magazine hosted a blog post entitled "Why Are Black Women Less Physically Attractive Than Other Women?" from Satioshi Kanazawa, a self-described "Scientific Fundamentalist"...
By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 17, 2011
Sound-Off: Sisters, Stop Sizing Each Other Up
News

Sound-Off: Sisters, Stop Sizing Each Other Up

Recently, I was walking through a mall with one of my good girlfriends and I couldn't help but notice the number of women checking us out. Not in a flirtatious way; they were appraising us. You know what I'm talking about, ladies: studying another woman's hair, face, clothes and shoes with judgment written all over your face. This is something I've caught sisters doing for years — and something I've made a point not to do myself — and it drives me up the wall...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 16, 2011
Sound-Off: Haynesworth Doesn't 'Like' Black Women
News

Sound-Off: Haynesworth Doesn't 'Like' Black Women

Coaches and teammates of NFL defensive tackle Albert Haynesworth are probably wondering which is worse: his inability to keep his hands to himself or his attempts to clear his name. The 29-year-old Redskins player recently pled not-guilty to sexual abuse charges, after a waitress accused him of fondling her breasts as she carried a tray of drinks. His response to the allegations? "She's just upset I have a White girlfriend. I couldn't tell you the last time I dated a Black girl... I don't even like Black girls..."

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 12, 2011
Sound-Off: I'm Not Afraid to Be a Single Black Woman
News

Sound-Off: I'm Not Afraid to Be a Single Black Woman

Over a year has passed since a controversial "Nightline" special dared to ask a national audience comprised of people from all colors, creeds and backgrounds: "Why can't Black women find men?" The program aired shortly after the release of statistical data regarding American marriage, which found Black women lagging behind women of other races when it comes to jumping the broom. Sadly, while there has been some great conversation that has emerged from this "issue," there is still rampant, unproductive and downright nasty chatter about Black women and their search for love...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · May 2, 2011
Sound-Off: Rihanna's 'T.M.I.' Description of Sex Life
News

Sound-Off: Rihanna's 'T.M.I.' Description of Sex Life

In the new Rolling Stone, Rihanna offers an extremely revealing look at her sex life (and at her amazing body... what's in that Barbados water and how can I import some?). In addition to a few predictable questions about her former abuser, Chris Brown, and her upcoming role in the "Battleship" film adaptation, the 22-year-old singer gave a few details about her fetishes and desires that have started tongues to wagging and men to salivating. Here she describes the autobiographical tone of her single "S&M..."
By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · Apr 4, 2011
Sound-Off: Why Spaghetti Girl Fight Matters to Us
News

Sound-Off: Why Spaghetti Girl Fight Matters to Us

A new viral video depicting a skirmish between two Black teen girls and a White woman has surfaced on the net. The clip, which was filmed in Brooklyn, shows the 30-something woman harassing the young girls for eating on the train; without any obvious provocation, she calls them "animals" and "idiots". The teens return fire with a slew of insults about her weight and by calling her a few different kinds of...

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · Mar 22, 2011
Sound-Off: Are We Already Post-Post-Racial?
News

Sound-Off: Are We Already Post-Post-Racial?

Three years after the historic election of 2008, is the racial climate of the country getting worse? It seems like ever since we saw the election of a Black POTUS, we've gotten a little pushback from some Whites who'd rather keep the racial climate of this country as it has been for many years: terse, painful and informed by White privilege (see: the Tea Party movement, the efforts Arizona has made to make being an ethnic 'minority' illegal, etc). Others seem a bit too comfortable playing the "post" race card, using the n-word as if it's no longer taboo (see: John Mayer, Bristol Palin's new boyfriend and allegedly, Halle Berry's ex-beau Gabriel Aubry)... Here's what you had to say: Tashawna commented via Facebook: "I live in Texas. Racism is alive and well here and it never went away!" Marta wrote via Facebook: "We are finding out that there are a lot of closet-racists who have decided to finally come out of the closet."

By Jamilah-Asali I. Lemieux · Mar 15, 2011

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