Dating is hard. Sometimes he need professional help. Let me explain why I chose that route.
I’ve been writing about love and relationships for years, and I’ve put in lots of time studying, observing and learning as much as I could about the practice of finding and sustaining healthy love. And, I’m happy to report that I finally get it! Well, at least in theory. But I’m not so sure I have the practice part down just yet. That realization convinced me to take a break from the dating scene and get my crap together. I really had to face down some pretty mean demons, but alas, I’m ready to jump-start my love life again. But then, the burning question became, where do I start? I considered online dating sites, local bars, and even going on a blind date. Perhaps I could hang out at places where guys frequent, but then I could only think of sports bars and strip clubs. (Sigh.) Before I knew it, I found myself overwhelmed, and I simply gave up my radical contemplations. Then I thought to myself, why is this so hard?
Why can’t I just hire someone who is better at this than me? So, I made the decision to call The Matchmaking DUO and give them a shot at helping me find love. If you’re wondering why I would do something so “desperate,” you should know that it’s because I don’t feel it’s desperate at all. In fact, it’s the most logical relationship decision that I have made for quite some time now. I didn’t come to this conclusion lightly, these are the five factors that helped me get there.
1. I’m super duper busy.
In a nutshell, I’m a full time business owner and a caregiver to my disabled father. On top of 18- hour workdays, throw in being a favorite Auntie, a sassy sister and a helpful homegirl; I think it’s safe to say that my plate(s) are full.
2. I suck at dating.
This one was hard for me to admit, but I can’t even fake the funk anymore. The art of dating for women has a lot to do with playing coy and being good at “the game”. Ain’t nary a coy bone in my body, and they only game I’m good at is Candy Crush! Did I mention that I’m the worst at flirting?! If a guy winks at me, I’m steady passing him some eye drops (don’t laugh, this really happened). I’m actually good in long term situations, but courtship just gives me the blues.
3. I keep choosing the same type of dudes.
I’m not indecisive about the type of man that I want, but I clearly don’t know how to find that type of guy. I have a habit of choosing the tall, charming, smooth talking type that never actually shows up to do the heavy lifting. They are all in when there is fun to be had, but let some poo hit the pavement and they go invisible. I’m like, dang! Did somebody call ghostbusters when I wasn’t looking?
4. I have no social life.
As if my career and personal responsibilities weren’t enough of a challenge, throw in the fact that I’m an extreme introvert. My happiest moments are often spent with just me and my remote. Yes, every month, I go to a boatload of events, but that is all for business. Usually during those times, I’m in beast mode, not boo mode *shrugs*.
5. I need a man with clear intentions.
These days, time is my most valuable asset, and I’m not about to let anybody waste any of it with vague intentions and “gray area” relationships. I’m a straight, no-chaser kind of gal and I appreciate that trait in a man as well. The primary reason I chose The Matchmaking DUO is because they specialize in long-term connections. That’s right up my alley!
So here’s to a new approach to finding love. I’m not sure how this is all going to turn out, but at the very least, I plan to learn a heck of a lot.
Jai Stone is a socialpreneur, author, syndicated blogger and the founder of the Emotional Nudity Lifestyle Brand. Jai writes about love, life and the pursuit of authentic joy. Follow her on Twitter @JaiStone or visit her blog.