Hey people! Week two! I hope the start of your New Year has been as eye-opening and refreshing as mine. I almost fell back into an old situation. Thank God for maturity. Sometimes you have to move really slowly and assess the situation before you make a major move. In my slow crawl, I learned that while a person's circumstance may change, and while a person may mature, certain character flaws never go away. You have to know what you can and cannot deal with. Know what you want. If it is not what you want, do not move forward. What's the point...

Plus Size Model
Jan, 13, 2011


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Hey people! Week two! I hope the start of your New Year has been as eye-opening and refreshing as mine. I almost fell back into an old situation. Thank God for maturity. Sometimes you have to move really slowly and assess the situation before you make a major move.

In my slow crawl, I learned that while a person's circumstance may change, and while a person may mature, certain character flaws never go away. You have to know what you can and cannot deal with. Know what you want. If it is not what you want, do not move forward. What's the point?

Anyway, I have been at the center of my mind's universe lately. I am really trying to wrap my mind around what I want... what do I want to accomplish? Into what type of person do I want to evolve? What is important to me in terms of my career? What additional community based organizations am I going to align myself with and invest my time? What am I going to do for my own happiness and peace of mind? I could go on, but you get the picture.

I am focused on me! And I love it. In hindsight, I had a tendency to lose myself in relationships. The "lucky guy" somehow became my focal point. And oh, if he had kids... I became "mommy" overnight. And don't get me wrong, I loved it! I love being in a relationship and I love kids. I just need to remember ME when I'm in a relationship because I've yet to meet a man who forgot himself! And if I am focused on you, and you are focused on you, who is taking care of me?! Ah, that would be God! Okay! He has watched over me since '76! Thank you.

Here's a secret, I am comfortable in my own skin, but I would be a lot more comfortable if there was less off it! This battle of the "belly" has been a constant in my life since I was a little girl. I've decided to stop fighting myself. I will not punish myself for "wrong turns" or weight gain and I will not continue to beat myself up for mistakes I've made in the past. Every day we wake up is another day to do our best. I promise myself to do my best to be the best me from this day forth.The important thing for me to remember is this: Every day's best is different.

My best tomorrow may be better or worse than my best the next day. There are so many factors involved in life. With that... I am committing myself to treating my body better. I LOVE me and I want to take care of ME. Honestly, I've dropped a few pounds, but I have more I'd like to lose. People always say, "Oh, but you look great and you're tall and proportioned and blah, blah." I get it and I appreciate it, but this isn't about them. This is about ME and who I want to see when I look in the mirror; inside and out.

So, if you are interested, join me. Jennifer Hudson is not the only one who can drop weight! How about my girl, J Hudson?! She looks wonderful! I am truly excited for her. What a feeling that must be! I love kickboxing and spinning. And I have been taking classes in the mornings. Thank goodness for the great discount my job has with my fabulous gym! I wake up early, get to the gym for class, shower and get dressed there and go to the office straight from the gym. It works. I'm telling you, this morning workout means packing my gym bag at night and getting to bed early. It's a routine and I like it. I miss out on a few of my late night TV shows, but I have DVR! So I am good!

Okay, I gotta get ready for tomorrow's spin class.

Still thick, healthy and oh so special...

XO ~

PSM


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