WendyRose, My sentiment extactly! Ladies, WendyRose nailed it on the head!

Hello, After reading all this stories i decided to share my experience.

I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almlost 4 years. I am deeply in love with him... i keep recieving phone calls from a woman, saying that she is also dating him for 2 years. they have a kid together. I didn't believe her and I talk to him about it he keeps denialing it and said i don't trust him.... Im so confused my heart is broken

Wendy Rose you are the bomb! Girl, you've just summed up exactly why I don't talk to married men and I have broken off friendships with women who have dated married men (I was not going to be caught up in a birds of a feather flock together scenario). I did not want to be seen as THAT TYPE OF WOMAN. My mama raised me up to be able to look at myself in the mirror with no shame. I know you don't want to judge women who do that, but not me. I judge that because that is a CHARACTER issue for me. Your character is part of the essence of who you are. Girl, you need to write a book :-)

“Go home to your wife, work on making her happy.” Those were the words I spoke to a gentleman outside of a bar in Houston just recently at 2 o’clock in the morning. He looked at me as if I had three heads and his response was, “you really know how to get rid of a brother huh?” I smiled and walked to my car as if he never existed; I have taken that walk a thousand times.

Here is the truth, single does not equal desperate; this is a flawed equation. Yes, I am aware of the many women who have found themselves entangled in a torrid love affair with someone else’s husband; I dare not judge them, I am just not one of them. Maybe my outlook on life is different because I have been what a lot of women have not been; a wife. In a nutshell, I don’t want you, you belong to another woman. I don’t want hear about how you are staying for the kids, and how you haven’t had sex with your wife in 6 months, and how she nags you and doesn’t listen to you and puts you down; that’s your problem. I am not interested in anything pertaining to why you are in my face trying to buy me a drink and come back to my place at two in the morning. Didn’t you stand in front of witnesses and take vows that went like “forsaking all others” or something like that? Why aren’t you at home?

I don’t want it to be my number in your phone that raises the suspicion of your wife. I don’t want it to be my text message or sexy picture that she finds in your phone that makes her feel insecure. I don’t want it to be my voice on a message that she hears telling her husband goodnight. I don’t want to be the woman that she calls sitting on the other end of the phone protecting you. I don’t want the words “if you were doing your job at home, he would not need me” to ever leave my lips in the face of another woman. I don’t want to be your “friend.” If we are going to be friends, let’s be real friends. Introduce me to your wife, give me the home telephone number, and let us connect so that she will feel comfortable around me when you invite me to the family barbeque. I would love to be friends. But you don’t want to do that do you? You want to be the other kind of “friends.”

Let me see if I can breakdown the kind of friendship that you want. You want to give me your cell phone number; you want to put me under “Jeff” in your contacts. You want to call me, text me and sex me and even spend your household money taking me for drinks to tell me about your terrible marriage. You want to tell me all the things that your wife does not do; like have sex. You poor thing, she hasn’t touched you in months and you are really just being a man because you know you need to be there for the kids, so you can’t leave her. She has probably gained a little weight because she has put herself second and the needs of you and your kids first. But you really haven’t noticed that because you are sitting up at a bar with me at 2 o’clock in the morning, and I have no idea who you really are. I don’t know what its like to live with you, pick up your drawls off the floor and wipe the pee from around the toilet seat. I don’t have to listen to you snore and fart simultaneously and watch the drool come out of your mouth. I am not at home with your kids by myself while you are out kicking it with the fellas showing up at my house at 3a.m. expecting me NOT to be angry. Then when your wife goes off on you, you want to run to me to make all better; to make you feel like a man. You need your ego stroked; you need to be told that you are a great warrior and that your wife is stupid for treating you this way. The reason that I would know exactly what you needed is because instead of telling your wife you told me! I know everything! Because of our friendship I know exactly what you want, what you need, how you feel and most importantly, I know what to do! I don’t have this knowledge because I am a love Goddess, I have this knowledge because I have become your student, and instead of imparting your knowledge on your wife to make you marriage better, you gave it to me and I was able to undermine her. You gave me the power to infiltrate your marriage and make you think that the grass in greener on the other side! It’s a simple game, and women play it everyday; I don’t want to play. If you are not happy at home, seek counseling, guidance and other avenues to better communication; don’t seek me.

I don’t want to stand in judgment of the woman who wants to date a married man; it’s just something that I don’t want for my own life. No one can ever say what they would never do, but as women we are in full control of our choices. The first question that you should be asking is “are you married?” Men don’t really lie about this anymore because they think they are a commodity and too many us have allowed them to be trifling. When a man is married, he is off limits and this is a conscious choice that we are allowed to make, women we have ALL of the power; whether you have been a wife or not, you can understand this concept. Men we love you, but go home to your wife, work on making her happy.

WendyRose

Allegedly anonymous female, if you find yourself wanting to purchase tools to spy on your spouse or boyfriend, then I believe you already have the answer to what you need to do; exit the relationship or marriage. At the end of the day, would you want someone spying on your daily routines even if you were cheating or doing something wrong? Getting cheated on is the risk you take whenever you decide to have a relationship with someone which is the choice you made. As for those spy tools, you should be careful with those because if he is in anyway computer software savvy, he will notice certain kinds of activities running in the background. For reference, any program installed on a computer can either be found in the remove or uninstall program section in the control panel or the BIOS; all it takes is a little observation. Think about it; if he locked you out of the computer(s), he could very well know about these sorts of spyware tools and capable of detecting them.

It happened to me. I found out my husband was having an affair via text messages from the other woman that included pictures of her private areas. I feel this is not his first affair, I just caught him this time. I'm devastated and our marriage is destroyed. Now he want to work it out, go to counseling. I asked him why could you not come to this decision prior to you having an affair? Listen to your inner feelings ladies and gentleman, they are always right. Good luck and God bless.

Wake up women of all colors, that was yesterday, past when men cheat on their girlfriends/wives for other women. Today with the internet, in the research I have done, the majority of men today are cheating with men on the downlow, at lunchtime, boardroom meeting time and in between time. People have no idea what is going on in this country and it it commonplace! Lots of them go out with TV's&CD's and I don't mean electronics. So do yourself a favor and educate yourself, it all online for you to see.
~In the know~

I THINK MY WIFEY IS CHEATING & WANTED TO GET THE WEBSITE TO CHECK PHONE INFO.... THANX!

Ouch! Sorry, Linda. I am in the same situation. I had an ex who had clients calling the house, that he was involved with sexually. They says it takes half the time a relationship existed to heal from a past love. You have to take it one day at a time. Some pain you will never get over, but, you have to move on dispite the deception from the ex.

Good Luck!

Ladies if you want to catch your man cheating break your routine!
Change your plans at the last minute, and watch how he reacts.
Show up at his job unannounced.
If he usually gets home first, randomly be home before he is, un announced.
Last but not least,his friend/homeboy/dogg etc. knows everything he is doing, you need to meet him and his girlfriend.Compare stories with her for when your man has told you he was hanging with said friend.
Listen to everything he says, he will one way or another tell you everything he is doing, if your listening.

I think my husband is cheating as well. He has his own business so he is always out and about and have no normal hours. He leaves his phone sitting around and sometimes I look, there was one occassion where a woman left a message she miss him and when i confronted him of course he denied it and when i called her she claim there is nothing sexual with them just friends. He has sicne deleted her # out his phone but i still have it. i am sure he still tals to her

I have reason to believe my husband is cheating via mobile and pc. Working late is a common excuse due to the line of work. Please send me the email on how to catch a cheater because he is very cunning so its hard to get him to slip, i just need the truth. thanks

What if the cheater uses the library or internet cafe to contact lovers...But some people are dumb so goodluck.

lol..I'm sure cheaters now know what to look out for. What if the cheater has 20 phones then what are you guys gonna do?Giving out way too much info.

lol..I'm sure cheaters now know what to look out for. What if the cheater has 20 phones then what are you guys gonna do?Giving out way too much info.