Coach Felicia: The Day After

Photo by Keith Major
After spending a weekend restoring, tackling real-world struggles can be hard. Coach Felicia shares her thoughts on how to stay sharp. 

I spent last weekend enjoying the beauty of Providenciales as part of Michelle Hargrove’s Restoration Weekend—an exclusive retreat that takes place annually at luxury resorts around the world. The sole focus and aim is to provide women with the time, space and opportunity to be restored!

I spent my mornings speaking on Grace Bay Beach. And though the heat sometimes drained me, it didn’t matter because I was in the presence of amazing women who poured and shared their love, experiences and laughter with generosity of spirit.

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My emotions and hopes soared during those four memorable days, but once home, I could feel them sinking. Every day my sadness deepened and I found myself seeking solace in one of my favorite movies, The Joy Luck Club. 

As the heart stirring messages of the movie hit home, it dawned on me—I was dealing with the “day after” symptoms. Many times, as we look forward to something in life, we prep ourselves for the day before and the day of. But, life usually catches us off guard because we don’t think about the day after. That is usually when our strength is gone and when it is time to refocus, re-evaluate and recommit to new goals. When we reach the top of a mountain, there is no place to go but down. However, we must learn to set our sights on new mountains. 

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During Restoration Weekend, I worked and played on a level that stretched me. I was also exposed to the possibilities that exist outside of my current reality. Coming home challenged me with the need for more transformation in my daily life—reminding me that staying sharp requires I check in with myself on a consistent basis. Here are some questions I am using to guide me in that process:

1. What do I want? As I work with my clients, many of them are chasing an emotional state of being. They want to be happy, confident and fulfilled. There’s nothing unusual about that at all...but too many times, we lack awareness of who we need to be, what we need to require and what needs to take place in order for those emotions to be present in our lives. If we don’t take the time to uncover those truths, satisfaction can be a dangling carrot that we never manage to capture.

2. What am I willing to work for? Anything worth having will require hard work and the willingness to be uncomfortable. We must be willing to change. In order for me to recalibrate my attitude and thoughts, I had to spend time thinking about what changes I can make that will help to reproduce the Turks & Caicos experience in my daily life.  

3. What am I willing to lose? There is a powerful line in the movie when a mother tells her daughter, “Losing him does not matter—it is you who will be found.” As we work to realize the lives we’ve imagined, we will lose some things and people along the way. Life is a process of exchange. Too often, we focus on the pain of loss and it stops us.  Instead, we must fix our focus on the joy that comes from realizing more of who we are as we live the lives we’ve imagined!

Do Your Work: Spend 30 minutes to an hour answering the above questions.

Define Your Wealth: Spend 30 minutes to an hour answering the above questions.

Named the “North America’s Next Greatest Speaker” by eWomenNetwork, Coach Felicia is a Certified Empowerment Coach™ who empowers her clients to "Turn their Worth into Wealth" as she partners with them to DISCOVER their WORTH, DO the WORK and DEFINE their WEALTH. Get more insight, download the FREE “8 Choices Winners Must Make” seminar MP3 on her website.

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