NBA All-Star Weekend can be a man's dream and his woman's biggest, annually recurring nightmare.
This three-day sports event -- which is being held in Dallas on Valentine's Day weekend --is anchored by various basketball games and challenges. Of course any event replete with the NBA's finest brings out a host of loyal, and famous, sports fans. Guess that wouldn't be so bad if there weren't the rampant rumors that the function morphs into a Hedonism-esque weekend highly populated by female sports groupies willing to whatever it takes to get close to a superstar -- or Mr. Average Joe when all else fails.
Don't believe the hype. According to Audrey Griffin MAEd, founder of the site "Remove Your Cape" and former vice president of the NBA Wives Association, the weekend isn't just wild parties, anonymous sexcapades and morning after walks of shame. "There are lots of activities for families and couples," she says. "From the All-Star game to children's festivities that allow kids to meet their favorite players, the entire weekend can be a great experience for everyone." So, yes you can go. Ready for the hard truth? Your mate just might not want you and the kiddies tagging along. Cool beans. Accept it. It's fine. Even he needs a bit of "me time."
Be understanding. However, we all know hanging with the fellas doesn't give a man in a committed relationship an all-access pass to the tail. With that in mind, Griffin offers some tips on how to communicate with your mate, avoid obsessing over what "he may" be doing and enjoy your time apart.
Have fun: Plan a few girl's night activities for the weekend--or even getaway. Enjoying your own time will remind you of the importance of cultivating whom you are and why he may want to do the same.
Hang out with other committed folk: Neither party should go out with a bunch of single men or women. They're going to have very different motives for the outing, like meeting and/or hooking up.
Set clear boundaries: Make sure it is understood that just because this is a guys or gals trip it's not an excuse to do whatever. It's real simple: If you can't do it in front of your spouse, well then it shouldn't be done!
Check in with yourself: If you're having anxiety and sleepless nights about All-Star weekend or your man's all guy trip perhaps this is a red flag for other underlying issues. The bottom line is simply without trust it will be hard for any relationship to grow.
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